Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

I used to be sad about the climate apocalypse, but I went on a few dates and, honestly, I’m ready now.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

I’m doing pretty good for someone who rarely has a clue.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

How many calories does an audible sigh burn? Because I don’t think my Apple Watch is giving me credit for them.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

She took all my money, called me fat, AND stabbed me in the arm. I hate doctor appointments.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

No, I love darkness at 5pm and the death of a nation.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

After ejaculation, men automatically realize that everything is vanity upon vanity.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Was that meant to be a joke or did you just accidentally spill a bunch of words you were carrying around?

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

When I say I like when older men tell me what to do, I am talking about Yoda and his teachings.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

Imagine hating me, and I’m not even paying attention.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

I hope this email finds you in the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,587

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Old Spice doesn’t sound like something you wanna smell.

Seen just now on Threads:

No one shoots at your feet and tells you to dance anymore.

Just shared via TikTok:

Perhaps the most universal American experience is your mom being like, “Wasn’t he such a good dentist? He’s in prison now.”

Spotted on Pinterest:

I’m always happy when I come home from shopping and the note on the table reminds me of what I wanted to buy.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Avocado is just green butter.

Breaking via Messenger:

If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.

Going bananas on Reddit:

If you innocently act like you don’t know, people will explain dirty words to you and it’s hilarious.

Just landed via WeChat:

I hope all of you get laid and not laid off this year. Amen.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Mud season creeps up on us every year, destroying hearts and minds as well as light grey carpeting.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

The class: “You want us to do what?” Super Mario: “Jump around, catch and eat the giant mushroom, bang your head against the crates and, if necessary, crush all the critters. It’sa easy!”

3 weeks ago

Clever and funny text about Super Mario's playful and exaggerated instructions for adventure.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah yes, Super Mario always making the extraordinary sound so ordinary! 🍄💥 Who wouldn't want to jump around, eat mushrooms, and channel their inner plumber for a little critter crushing? It's just another day in the Mushroom Kingdom! 🌟🎮 #MarioLogic"

activity, around, bang, catch, class, crates, critter, crush, easy, eat, fun, fun activity, game, giant, head, humor, jump, Mario, mushroom, super, Super Mario, video, video game, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on Telegram this month:

All billionaires must submit a list of five things they did for society in the last week or their wealth shall be confiscated.

94 shares on Snapchat this month:

Oh no, a login from a new device? And that device is my phone? The one that I use every single day? And the location is my house, you say? Thank you so much for warning me. I will contact Interpol.

60 shares on Telegram this month:

I got one brain cell left and it moves around my head like a Windows screensaver.

90 shares on Telegram this month:

Sometimes I need a break from myself but it’s like, ugh, everywhere I go there I am.

24 shares on Reddit this month:

Dad Hack: Get your teen’s attention instantly by pre-heating the oven.

89 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety.

39 shares on Reddit this month:

You can make a salad without lettuce if you want, there are no rules.

88 shares on Snapchat this month:

Laying in a hammock is essentially saying, “I hope there are no emergencies.”

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The spelling of “bourgeoisie” was intended as yet another means of oppression.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Texting is so boring. Just show up to my door with roses.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine hating on me and I’m just sitting there in the corner, in the spotlight, losing my religion.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Some people shop for designer heels. I shop for nonstop flight deals.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey, sorry I cant make it tonight. I am beset on all sides by foes.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

My cat and I talked it over and no we don’t think that I’m crazy.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s called shitposting, Your Honor. You should try it sometimes; it’s liberating.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Forget Spotify Wrapped. I’m more interested in seeing your Pornhub Wrapped.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Tonight, the moon is staring at me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,325

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Women are so hot, I wish they were good people.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

I love spending my parents’ money, they must pay for bringing me into this world.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

It’s always a huge relief when I’m reading a list of symptoms of a deadly disease, and it says unexplained weight loss.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

If you say “Excellent choice” after somebody selects a floor in an elevator, you can usually get a pity laugh.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

I love airports because the rules of society don’t apply. Eat a pizza and have a glass of wine at 7 am while in track pants. Nobody cares.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Welcome to your 50s, where coffee is the new happy hour and mornings are the new hangover.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Is he trying to pronounce “charcuterie” or is he having a stroke?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

I don’t trust anyone who gets enraged over messed-up fast food orders.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

Stop checking your phone every minute. No one loves you.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

I’m so grateful when people tell me to drive safe, cause then I remember not to drive off that cliff.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

When I tell a joke that doesn’t land, I follow up with a worse one to make my audience realize how good they had it with the first joke.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Life so stupid, I just want a burger and to be held.

Seen just now on Discord:

Vacation is a time when every part of you can relax except your bowels.

Just shared via X:

I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

Live now on Snapchat:

Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store.

Going viral on YouTube:

I told my daughter to check her attitude, and she responded, “For complaints about attitude, please contact the manufacturer.”

Going bananas on TikTok:

I may not have lost all my marbles yet, but there’s a small hole in the bag somewhere.

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