Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.
  • I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
  • Today’s book recommendation: “The Art of Silence” by the famous Chinese philosopher Shut-Up.
  • Parents be like “don’t believe everything you see on the internet” then believe everything they see on Facebook.
  • I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.
  • My kidnappers sent me back early with a full apology, some money, and several of their fingers.