Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"James Bond: saving the world one perfectly adjusted hotel shower at a time! 🚿💼 License to kill… time while figuring out the water temperature. 😎🌍 #007Plumber"

bond, character, confidence, hotel, hotel room, humor, incredible, james, James Bond, know, observation, room, shower, skills, spy, thing, walk

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

People say “go big or go home” like going home is a bad thing. Heck yeah, I want to go home, and I’ll have a nap when I get there.

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2 months ago

bad, big, choices, go big, go home, home, humor, i, life, life choices, nap, people, relaxation, rest, thing, want
Adulthood is just always being tired and wondering how you hurt your back.

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2 months ago

adult, adult life, adulthood, aging, always, back, back pain, being, everyday, everyday struggles, fatigue, humor, hurt, injury, just, life, pain, struggles, tired, wondering
When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

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2 months ago

disappointment, expectation, future, growing, growing up, humor, i, kid, much, never, reality, sarcasm, suck
My child had pancakes and syrup for breakfast so I guess I’ll be sticking to my furniture for the next week.

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2 months ago

breakfast, child, furniture, guess, humor, i, next, pancakes, parenting, sticking, sticky, syrup, week
My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

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2 months ago

after, bathroom, bathroom mirror, girl, hangover, help, humor, mirror, morning, morning after, party, party weekend, self-care, vitamins, weekend
I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

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3 months ago

aging, appearance, big, cosmetic, directions, face, filler, getting, humor, i, joke, just, looking, love, okay, people, start, younger

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on Twitch this month:

I have so much planned today that I was already tired thinking of it yesterday.

31 shares on Reddit this month:

The worst thing I’ve seen as a paramedic is my paycheck.

64 shares on Slack this month:

I just want a man to look at me the way Doc from ‘Back to the Future’ looks when something exciting happens.

90 shares on X this month:

“You have reached your monthly article limit,” – a website you’ve never accessed before today.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

Big city friend is complaining about a 10 minute wait for a subway while I sit here waiting for the rail replacement horse.

74 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m bored, but not “read a book for fun” bored.

87 shares on Threads this month:

Going from “I can fix her” to “I don’t care if she lives or dies” in the same beer.

28 shares on Pinterest this month:

Want to know what someone is really like? Play Monopoly with them.

51 shares on Instagram this month:

Don’t rub your happiness in people’s faces this Valentine’s Day. Let the couples enjoy themselves for once.

99 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Just googled “insanity” over and over but was expecting different results.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Some people are like clouds. When they go away it’s much better.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

Santa doesn’t check the naughty list anymore, he just checks social media.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

I think my soulmate might be carbs.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

The first Humans saw the sun go up and then back down, and so they decided to call it a day.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

The shrooms told me that we need to get our shit together. That humanity is a bundle of bad habits. I’m headed back in a few weeks, and they need a response from us. What do I tell them?

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

I made soup while whispering “He was never mine,” like it’s 1893, and I just lost my beloved to a duel.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I wasn’t feeling well so I googled my symptoms. I either have allergies or I died two days ago.

Going viral on TikTok:

One time I refused to buy a watch because it was only waterproof to 100 meters. Not sure what sort of future I was imagining for myself there.

Spotted on Slack:

I didn’t expect to have such strong feelings when the subtitles said “smooching” while the actors were kissing.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Never mind a Roomba, I need a robot garbage can that will follow my kids around the house all day.

Just shared via Instagram:

I’m a people pleaser, unless you don’t like that. Then I’m not.

Just shared via YouTube:

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this red wine just now.

Breaking via Threads:

I’m currently trying not to read anything about carbohydrates after 4pm.

Trending via Telegram:

The hardest thing about chess is the other guy is always doing some shit.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

How to write complaints: “Dear customer service, first of all, you should know that I am typing this with my middle finger.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

People say “go big or go home” like going home is a bad thing. Heck yeah, I want to go home, and I’ll have a nap when I get there.

Adulthood is just always being tired and wondering how you hurt your back.

When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

My child had pancakes and syrup for breakfast so I guess I’ll be sticking to my furniture for the next week.

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨