Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I don’t need a midlife crisis. My whole life is a crisis.
  • I woke up this morning and my hair looked like a Beatles lyric. Here, there, and everywhere.
  • I suck at flirting, I end up arguing with them instead.
  • As an academic, I sometimes dream about writing fiction instead, and then I remember grant proposals.
  • Only mosquitoes find me attractive. Nobody else.
  • To cut the long story short, I have spent all my money.