Trendy Funny Quotes

  • The question I ask myself most often is, “What would a jury think about this?”
  • I lost my composure in 1992. I haven’t seen it since.
  • I didn’t buy that thing I wanted but didn’t need, so I celebrated by buying a different thing I wanted but didn’t need.
  • I always fear that one day I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet.
  • If your man cheats on you, dump him and date his dad, make him your step son.
  • I often wonder how men could discover entire continents. Mine can’t even find the butter in the fridge.