Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • A big F*** YOU to people driving small cars and pulling deep into parking spaces so I think I have a spot until the last second.
  • What we need is an evil Santa who steals our children’s most annoying toys.
  • I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so they won’t think something is wrong with me.
  • Getting excited to go to bed is a different level of adulting.
  • Me at war: You guys mind if I leave a bit early today?
  • Being an iPad baby must be so exciting. Imagine going from nine dull months in the womb to playing Candy Crush.