Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Why put off until tomorrow what you can have an intern do today?
  • Throwing a spear at your enemy is a bad gamble. If you miss, you have no spear now and he’s just fine. He’s better than fine; now he has a spear.
  • Whoever named the grapefruit when there was already a fruit named grape. Incompetent legend. I wish we could hang out.
  • Noam Chomsky sounds like the legal name of the very hungry caterpillar.
  • I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.
  • Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.