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"When in a tough spot, channel your inner Jesus 🙏 Just remember, resurrection isn't an everyday skill for most of us 😂🕊️ #WWJD #DisappearingAct"

days, dead, disappear, humor, i, Jesus, pretend, resurrection, sarcasm, think, trouble, whenever, wit

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84 shares on YouTube this month:

I pray this boy wins in life. I wanna see him on top of me.

86 shares on Pinterest this month:

Adulthood means trying to convince yourself that the font is just too small and that it isn’t your eyesight going bad.

74 shares on Discord this month:

“Gen Z is having less sex.” It’s always sex, sex, sex with these people.

90 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Oh, sorry, I can’t right now. I’m imagining some things and worrying about them.

16 shares on Snapchat this month:

Japanese Latina catgirl be like ña.

50 shares on Snapchat this month:

“I didn’t vote for this.” — people who absolutely voted for this but thought this would only hurt people they hate.

92 shares on WeChat this month:

Bok Choy is a dope name for a vegetable.

73 shares on Instagram this month:

I swear, if my memory was any worse, I could plan my own surprise party.

98 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sometimes I wonder if the plot ever gets tired of being twisted.

28 shares on Slack this month:

Are you just gonna go with the flow until you spiral down the drain?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Gutted to report that spending a day offline, touching grass with my friends, was phenomenal for my mental health.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

My sex face is the same as my first pee in three hours face.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Maybe your dog is barking at my luggage because he doesn’t enjoy his job, officer.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Maybe the elephant doesn’t want to be addressed, and we should respect their boundaries.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

For as long as that song was, you’d think the Ghost Busters would have mentioned their phone number at least once.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Used to wonder why my parents couldn’t grasp technology, but now, anytime I see something new, I’m like, “I’m not learning that.”

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

Apparently, stress balls are not supposed to be thrown at people who are stressing you out.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

It’s the weekend, so naturally, I’m going to spend 48 hours doing nothing, and still be exhausted.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not exhausted, that’s just your face now.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

The only exercise I done last month was running out of money.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

When the gun shoots your brain, that’s amore.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

My life is based on a true story.

Going viral on Twitch:

I hope Instagram is still active during the apocalypse, so the zombies can post pics of whose brains they’re currently eating.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Photos are cool because they are like now but for later.

Going viral on Messenger:

Using a remote to type on a keyboard on the TV is truly one of the worst human experiences that we endure.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I have no prime. I will evolve till I die.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Having to pee really puts things into perspective. Like, OK, none of this matters.

Trending via YouTube:

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

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Activity Log ✨

Whenever Im in trouble, I think, what would Jesus do? Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for 3 days.

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Whoever coined, “No good deed goes unpunished”, must have fed some seagulls.

Like many men my age, my biggest regret is hiring the inexpensive hitman.

“Comparison is the thief of joy!” Well, not if you’re better than everyone else.

I used to think adulthood was one crisis after another. I was wrong. Multiple crises. Concurrently. All at once. All the time. Forever.

Just looked around and realized it’s everyone’s first time living.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Whenever Im in trouble, I think, what would Jesus do? Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for 3 days.

Keep the laugh going 😂

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Whoever coined, “No good deed goes unpunished”, must have fed some seagulls.

Like many men my age, my biggest regret is hiring the inexpensive hitman.

“Comparison is the thief of joy!” Well, not if you’re better than everyone else.

I used to think adulthood was one crisis after another. I was wrong. Multiple crises. Concurrently. All at once. All the time. Forever.

Just looked around and realized it’s everyone’s first time living.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨