Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

All my life lessons were learned by watching people who took my advice.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

I was sad, but then I ordered some new clothes. I’m okay now.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

How are they running out of oxygen if they’re breathing it right back into the submarine?

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

I identify as a weather forecast: Anything’s possible.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

My dad wasn’t absent or present; he was a secret third thing.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

A sperm bank implies the existence of sperm markets, which further implies the existence of high-frequency sperm trading.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

Your fingers have fingertips, but your toes don’t have toetips. Yet, you can tiptoe but not tipfinger.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

I keep screenshots the way my husband keeps old cords, stored neatly away until the day I might need them.