Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Parenting just means you have to pretend you like to eat fruits and vegetables in front of your kids, knowing you’d rather eat a cheeseburger instead.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Talking to animals doesn’t make you crazy, hearing them talk back does.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

The older I get, no.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

I am like the weather. Temporarily friendly.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

If I let you into my life, I am either emotionally invested or you are a grilled cheese sandwich.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

Parenting is yelling ‘you just had a snack!’ over and over until you give in and throw them another snack.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

“I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

My favorite hobby is withering away.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,620

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I don’t have a five-year plan because every two years I realize I need a different life.

Breaking via TikTok:

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

Shared recently on Messenger:

Lord, take away my suffering and give it to anyone who’s ever said, ‘Hey, Grok.’

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I believe libraries are our proof that we once valued curiosity.

Trending via Messenger:

I accidentally take a screenshot of my phone background at least once a week.

Going viral on YouTube:

A haunted house, but every room is just learning more about Will & Jada.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Me: This is a hard escape room. Manager: You’re at work.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

Making waves on Telegram:

Your skull is the only thing preventing your brain from floating away, unburdened as it is by any meaningful thought to anchor it.

You can’t be everyone’s cup of tea, let them sip on their own bland brew.

0
You can’t be everyone’s cup of tea, let them sip on their own bland brew.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
🍵☕️ "Who needs to be everyone's cup of tea when you're a bold espresso in a world of lukewarm lattes? Let them sip on their boring cups of 'meh' while you brew up some caffeinated charisma!" ☕️🌟 #EmbraceYourEspressoFlavor

, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

64 shares on TikTok this month:

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

50 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

Doggy style means I get a treat afterwards, right?

65 shares on X this month:

I’m starting to think the real hell is just being stuck in an infinite loop of self-doubt and bad life choices.

95 shares on Twitch this month:

Working as a 911 operator but hanging up when someone starts screaming because I’m an empath, and it overwhelms me.

50 shares on Telegram this month:

Feeling feral. Better make some mac and cheese.

14 shares on Snapchat this month:

Being in your 20s is crazy because, why did you stay with someone you were that incompatible with for that long?

47 shares on Instagram this month:

My signature move is to tell men that I can’t hear them because I have my headphones in when I quite visibly don’t have headphones in.

19 shares on TikTok this month:

Imagine applying for a job, then not picking up calls from random numbers.

90 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The brand name Oral B is so funny to me. WTF does the B stand for?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Shaved my entire body for this post, just in case.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Petition to lower the retirement age. I’m tired now.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent a “stay signed in” checkbox that isn’t meaningless.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

“You shouldn’t let your cat jump on the counter”, my cat could take out a loan in my name if he wanted to.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not exhausted, you’re just awake. Have a nice day.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a comedian. My pronouns are ha/ha.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“I don’t do politics.” Politics will do you, my brother and sister. Politics will do you like mad.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

If you respond to my sarcasm with better sarcasm, then I might just catch feelings.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The internal struggle between wanting to be productive and just wanting to nap all day.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,627

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I was going to learn to play the violin, but it was too much of a commitment. I wanted something with no strings attached.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

America is truly the best country in the world at not learning from their mistakes.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

What, and I cannot stress this enough, day is it.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Humanity doesn’t always make a compelling case for its continued existence.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

Doing dishes is like fighting a hydra — wash one, and two more appear.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

“I’m not falling for that again,” I say, as I’m about to fall for whatever that is again.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

You know the nap is good when it left you marks.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I’m the guy at Apple who makes sure all your featured photos are your exes and your dog that died.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Cholesterol has a special place in my heart.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

This wouldn’t happen to me if I were a huge dragon.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

My husband said it would be easier if we had a Christmas house that we moved into in December, instead of taking all these decorations out.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Women are able to leave the country unexpectedly at any time with the contents of their handbag.

Breaking via Threads:

I’m in favor of sticking an “out of order” sign on some people’s foreheads. As a warning.

Going viral on Facebook:

The human brain is amazing. It functions 24/7 from the day we’re born and only stops when you’re taking a test or speaking to someone attractive.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I like waiters. They bring a lot to the table.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Sorry I was late, I was waiting for my CVS receipt to finish printing.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

This meeting could have been a pajama party.

Making waves on X:

Home is where you can say anything because nobody’s really listening, anyway.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I don’t need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry!

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴