Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I think Cinderella should have lived a happy life with all her animal friends rather than settle for a man who had her try on a shoe because he didn’t recognize her without makeup.
  • I’m done with dating sites and am now only focusing on food delivery people. They have a job, a car, and most importantly food.
  • Google Maps should not count towards my screen time. I’m not addicted to my phone, I’m disoriented.
  • Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.
  • Arkansas is just Kansas for pirates.
  • I’m not a dietitian, but if you eat pizza right at midnight your body doesn’t know if the calories go towards yesterday or today so they don’t count.