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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Finally figured out why I look so bad in pictures – it’s my face.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Breakfast is the most important beer of the day.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

You can just enjoy kombucha. You don’t need to go on a tirade about cleansing your gut.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

I may look fine on the outside, but on the inside I’m hungry again.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

Why do Marvel movies need 3 hours to accomplish what The Powerpuff Girls did in 11 minutes?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Someone was saying that social media makes you miss out on your real life, but have you seen real life?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Playing dumb for five minutes often saves a lot of work.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

My watch battery is fully charged. So I got some time.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

770 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,932

Funny Quotes Topics

13,903

Funny Quotes Images

10,932

30 minutes ago

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

What we need is more companies making hot sauce. I need 900 more ways to taste a thing that tastes exactly like all the other ones.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Wanted to report a YouTube video, but there is no option for “Cringe”, so I just picked “Terrorism”.

Just landed via Slack:

One does not simply become a master of karate. First, you must accidentally walk into a spider web.

Going viral on WeChat:

I think carefully about what I’m going to say and I still manage to say the wrong thing. It’s truly a gift I have.

Freshly posted on X:

Feeling like a bug without his rug.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Only thing sexier than a bad decisions is a bad decision with queso.

Seen just now on Threads:

If you see my account doing wild or out-of-character things, no worries. It’s not me, I routinely rent it out as an Airbnb.

Trending via X:

Bob was hungry. He ripped open a new bag of tortillas only to discover a convenient, resealable opening on the other end.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Hello bedtime my old friend, my brain is laughing once again.

Broadcasted on Threads:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

You can always tell when a man’s mustache is performative and not representative of his true spirit.

5 months ago

You can always tell when a man’s mustache is performative and not representative of his true spirit.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old conundrum of the deceptive ‘stache! 🧐 It’s like a tiny, wiggly curtain trying to hide the true face behind it. 🎭 Beware the mustache charlatans, for their upper lip abode may not be what it seems! 🕵️‍♂️👨"

always, appearance, humor, identity, masculinity, mustache, performative, representative, spirit, tell, true

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

770 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,932

Funny Quotes Topics

13,903

Funny Quotes Images

10,932

30 minutes ago

3,430

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

I always take responsibility for my actions when there is no one else around to blame.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Spring is what we call the time in between complaining about the cold and complaining about the heat.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

There’s nothing that I hate more than a failed nap attempt.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

How are there low birth rates when everyone here is a big baby?

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

I had an irrational fear of bees until I saw My Girl and it became rational.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Twitter is basically everyone’s therapist’s couch.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

I’m putting free wifi on my gravestone, so people will come visit me.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Employees should have to take their boss’s last name.

Going viral on Twitch:

I’ll never be badass enough to walk around chewing on a toothpick.

Going viral on Twitch:

People who live alone should get one practice conversation before they have to speak out loud for the first time that day.

Just shared via Slack:

The fewer friends at your birthday party means more cake for you. Follow me for more life hacks.

Freshly posted on Discord:

My signature move is waving at someone who is waving at the person behind me.

Just shared via Discord:

Christmas adverts: “Eat all the food! Drink all the drink! Spoil yourself! It’s Christmas!” New year adverts: “Look at what you’ve done to yourself, you fat sack of shit!”

Reported on Facebook:

Robots eating a bowl of cereal that’s actually a bunch of nuts and bolts, you don’t see that as much anymore.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Just spent a couple seconds concerned about the sounds my stomach was making before realizing it was a motorcycle outside.

Going viral on Threads:

Notice how you don’t catch me in public, it’s because i’m not real.

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