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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

If Facebook has taught us anything it’s that a lot of people aren’t quite ready for a spelling bee.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

The more stupid the views, the harder it is to talk people out of them.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Most guys probably just have a foot fetish because their first girlfriend was a sock.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

One of the best examples of someone posing a question that they already know the answer to is the WeightWatchers website asking me if I accept cookies.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

You’ll never be as lazy as the person who named the fireplace.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so they won’t think something is wrong with me.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Spiders have the whole world to explore but still try to come up in my house.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

It’s important to get out of the house every once and a while to remind yourself of why you don’t go out.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

Arguing through text will have you standing in one spot for 40 mins.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

5 minutes ago

3,428

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I’m really glad that light only attracts insects. Imagine wild boars would come knocking at your windows all the time.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Sorry, I had feelings. I’ll replace them with jokes right away.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I need money, not feelings.

Shared recently on X:

I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.

Just landed via Discord:

Taylor Swift should write a song about people who don’t return their shopping carts to the corrals.

Just shared via Instagram:

Some people spend a fortune so they can circle the world. I drink some beer and the world circles around me.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Just shared via Messenger:

Every homemade dinner counts as negative calories because of the exercise we get waving pillows at the smoke detectors.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I love how these vegans still drink water. That’s a fish’s house!

I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

3 months ago

I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, the nostalgic longing for those spooky nights at the strip club with The Weeknd's eerie tunes 🌙💃🎶! It's like reminiscing about that unique hybrid of chills and thrills you never knew you'd miss so dearly. Who would've thought haunted strip club music could hold such a special place in our hearts? 😂✨ #SpookyStrippers

club, good, good times, haunted, i, know, miss, music, nostalgia, strip, strip club, times, Weeknd

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

5 minutes ago

3,419

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

Stretching isn’t enough, I need to be able to disassemble my body like legos.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Italy stands for I Truly Always Love You.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

The way time stretches between the moment you put your hands under the air dryer and the realization it is in fact a paper towel dispenser.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

The difference between us is that people can peck you and I’m impeccable.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

The older you get, the farther away your toenails are when they need a trim.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Thinking about stepping down from being an adult, I’m just not in the right headspace for this position right now. I really appreciate the opportunity though.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Eating trail mix should count as hiking.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Sorry, I can’t come. I’m still recovering from the last time I went out.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

Of all the things to lose why couldn’t it have been my appetite and not my mind.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

Spotted on Threads:

The idiot’s diet is just biting your tongue.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Can’t, holding a grudge.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’m having a bad day. Please send super-cute pics of your credit cards to cheer me up.

Trending via Snapchat:

I was walking near a construction site today and heard the foreman yell, “You’re doing a good job!” I know that was meant for me.

Just shared via Slack:

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

Making waves on Threads:

Some people graduate with honors, I am just honored to graduate.

Reported on Discord:

LinkedIn: where you desperately hope that one idiot you had a drink with six years ago can somehow help get you a job.

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