Wordgag ใƒ„

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

My signature move is forgetting someoneโ€™s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡พ has shared:

I absolutely hate being woken from a nap. There were other treadmills in the gym that dude could have used.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ท has copied:

I just really hope The Weekndโ€™s real name isnโ€™t Mnday.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ช has downloaded:

It really is Monday every 15 minutes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that Iโ€™m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, itโ€™s probably just that Mercuryโ€™s in retrograde again.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ has copied:

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ง has downloaded:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

If you love someone be brave enough to tell them. Otherwise be brave enough to watch them dating someone else.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฉ has viewed:

Always tell people different stories about yourself, so when they talk about you, theyโ€™ll argue.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

768 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,930

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,930

Updated

7 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Live now on Slack:

Mail is crazy because it’s like 99 pieces of straight up garbage and 1 that if you don’t reply to you’re going to jail.

Making waves on WeChat:

Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Breaking via Slack:

Children will see a neatly hanging dish towel and be like oh hell no.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

Making waves on Instagram:

Memories are a bit fuzzy – but regrets? Theyโ€™re in 8K and Dolby Vision.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Sorry, my face wasnโ€™t created to hide that much distain for what youโ€™re saying.

Spotted on Threads:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

Trending via Slack:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks Iโ€™m dumb.

Just landed via Discord:

I’m sorry for inventing the universe.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Posing for photos has to be the most basic thing I’m actually terrible at.

I can’t even think straight knowing a package got delivered while I’m not home.

I can’t even think straight knowing a package got delivered while I’m not home.
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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

768 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,930

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,930

Updated

7 minutes ago

Users Online

3,438

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ผ has downloaded:

Despite popular opinion, dating apps are NOT for dating. They are for finding people to watch your Instagram story for years and years.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฟ๐Ÿ‡ผ has bookmarked:

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡น has bookmarked:

Every morning I regret why I didnโ€™t sleep earlier the night before.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฑ has bookmarked:

I tried being the bigger person but all it got me was type 2 diabetes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ณ has downloaded:

Getting out of bed should count as resistance training.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ด has viewed:

You know itโ€™s a fancy restaurant when you have to point at what you want on the menu because you canโ€™t pronounce the name.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

How much chocolate is too much chocolate before it is technically no longer a salad?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has copied:

Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like โ€œUghhh, make me longer!โ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ง has bookmarked:

I’m like 2% cute and 98% ugly.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ป has downloaded:

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Spotted on Pinterest:

You gotta be careful: don’t say a word to nobody about nothing anytime ever.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

You don’t scare me. You’re not a parking garage that I can’t figure out how to get out of.

Spotted on Pinterest:

The sandwich I made for lunch didnโ€™t even make it until 10am.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Why is it called โ€œfree timeโ€ when I use it to spend all my money?

Spotted on Pinterest:

I’m actually really peace-loving, but then there are other people.

Spotted on Telegram:

Before Google, if you didnโ€™t know something you had to go ask someone and most of the time they couldnโ€™t help you, and now thatโ€™s also how Google works.

Reported on TikTok:

They should have a special lane for texting and driving.

Just shared via Facebook:

I think it broke my boyfriendโ€™s heart when I said he couldnโ€™t have Salma Hayek for Valentineโ€™s Day.

Just shared via Discord:

Hosting Thanksgiving? Bring up politics so everyone will leave early.

Reported on Reddit:

I love being an adult and sitting absolutely still and suddenly I’ve hurt my neck somehow.

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