Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.
  • I love replying to people within seconds. Hello. I am here. Always.
  • “It’s not that deep.” Of course it’s not. With a shallow mind like yours, nothing ever is.
  • The absolute injustice of being asked to come and take away the boxes of junk that you’ve been storing at your parents’ house for 20 years.
  • It’s okay, wobbly chair, I’m unstable too.
  • An eye exam where the optometrist makes you read a menu under dim lights.