Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

You did all that terrible driving just to end up right next to me at the stop light.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Posing for photos has to be the most basic thing I’m actually terrible at.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Just had a salad but it didn’t make me laugh like women in stock photos.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

God: “You’re all really bad at this.”

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

My wife has a weird habit of starting conversations by saying, “Are you even listening to me?”

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

If oats can be milk, you can be whatever you want.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I’m thinking of maybe killing off a few characters in the book I’m writing. That will really spice up my autobiography.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2242 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,404

Funny Quotes Topics

15,108

Funny Quotes Images

12,404

Updated

59 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

In a job interview, you can always respond to an awkward question with a deep gaze and parted lips, followed by “You complete me.”

Spotted on Twitch:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here hating myself more.

Just shared via TikTok:

Imagine hating me and I don’t notice.

Making waves on Reddit:

I am not in a good place, geographically.

Just landed via X:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I was not meant for Microsoft Teams.

Making waves on Reddit:

Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Never mind, I’ll buy my own stuff.

Going viral on TikTok:

Wish I could step out of my body and take my own damn pictures.

Spotted on WeChat:

“My reading glasses would look good on your nightstand.” -Me, flirting.

Shared recently on YouTube:

“Have you asked Chat GPT?” Have you lost your mind?

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.
All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Now that's an organizing strategy I can get behind – after all, why not add a little alphabetical order to the chaos of different heights? Just imagine the confusion when you're torn between proudly standing tall and resigning yourself to your place in the alphabetical pecking order!"

, , , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2242 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,404

Funny Quotes Topics

15,108

Funny Quotes Images

12,404

Updated

59 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Why would I take the high road when I could take the psychopath?

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Three out of five times, my intuition is right. Not in casinos, though.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Don’t let anyone ruin your day. Be a man. Ruin it yourself.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

Not looking for a sugar daddy, but something more of a pay pal.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

90% of parenting is wondering when you can lie down again.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

The magician told me to “Pick a card! Any card!” So I took his Visa.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Work beers should be a daily thing.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

You’re either really good at wrapping presents or you’re really beautiful and funny. It’s one or the other.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Rule #1 for family reunions: Always bring your own car so you can take off whenever you want.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

That moment when you finish watching a TV series and you don’t know what to do with your life any more.

Going viral on Facebook:

“What’s your music taste?” Don’t know, man. If it sounds good, I’m adding it to the playlist.

Just shared via Slack:

Spice up your work day by drinking your coffee from a flask.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Welcome to your 50s, your joints are now meteorologists.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Does everyone’s inner monologue have a laugh track?

Reported on Slack:

When a man is a good cook, that cancels out like three red flags.

Breaking via Telegram:

People that ask Grok “Is this true” are the reason our society is getting dumber by the minute.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

“Dating pool” is incredibly optimistic. More like dating drainage.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴