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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

I’m old enough to remember when rainbows were in black and white.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

I wonder if BBQ thinks about me too.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Work beers should be a daily thing.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

You don’t really see women throwing their boyfriend’s stuff out the window anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

They get real weird at the gun store if you walk in crying and asking for “the biggest one”.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

You can’t spell crypto without “cry”.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

When I bark at a dog, I always worry that I might have inadvertently said something wrong.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Called in telepathically this morning, so they know I’m thinking of them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2502 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,664

Funny Quotes Topics

15,336

Funny Quotes Images

12,664

1 minute ago

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

I’ll call it a smartphone when I yell “Where’s my phone?” and it yells back “Down here in the couch cushions!”

Just landed via TikTok:

With all the fake information out there, I refuse to believe scales or mirrors.

Live now on Pinterest:

I don’t think you all understand. If Taylor Swift didn’t have a private jet, she’d be Taylor Slow.

Trending via Reddit:

If you look close enough, everyone is insane.

Shared recently on X:

My thighs are bigger than my chances in life.

Going viral on Slack:

Humans are the only species that would cut down trees, make paper out of them, and then write “Save the Trees” on it.

Just landed via YouTube:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

Shared recently on Slack:

If you ever think you can solve a parenting problem by doing the opposite of what didn’t work last time, the universe will just be like “Lol, nice try, dummy!”

Going viral on Telegram:

It’s so hot, ice bears are opening lemonade stands.

Going viral on Reddit:

I don’t run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone, and ignore them like all other adults.

A man’s home is his castle, but his garage is his sanctuary.

Jan 20, 2025

A man’s home is his castle, but his garage is his sanctuary.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs a castle when you have a sanctuary for cars? 🚗🏰 Let's be real, the garage is where the real magic happens – where tools become wands and oil stains are the battle scars of DIY warriors! 🛠️💪 Embrace your inner king of the garage! 👑🔧"

castle, garage, home, humor, man, personal, personal space, sanctuary, space

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2502 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,664

Funny Quotes Topics

15,336

Funny Quotes Images

12,664

1 minute ago

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

What would you do if you were in my situation right now? The situation being that I’m drunk.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Sometimes when I’m having a particularly stressful day, I take a pregnancy test to remind myself that at least one thing in my life is still going as planned.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

In honor of the last eclipse, I will also get in the way of someone brighter than me.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed and the other half don’t know how to do math.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Going to work has backfired on me so many times.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

I’m only awake because my coffee needs me.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Quitting my job to pursue my true passion: not working.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Don’t you hate it when you lose things? Like the motivation to do anything.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

Yesterday I really wanted tacos and now I’m eating tacos. Follow your dreams!

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Instead of writing LOL, I’m going to start writing SALTS (smiled a little, then stopped). It’s more accurate.

Seen just now on Slack:

Good morning to everyone except the baristas who don’t tighten the lid.

Just shared via TikTok:

Most divorces are caused by a spouse eating potato chips while you try to watch TV.

Going viral on Snapchat:

The difference between a hippo and a zippo is that one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter. Thank you and good night.

Going viral on YouTube:

Yeah, bro, she’s probably just not using her phone right now, for the first time ever in her whole life.

Reported on Slack:

Dear nurses, you don’t have to announce my weight, just write it down. That’s why I have my eyes closed when I’m on the scale.

Live now on Pinterest:

Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

Just shared via Reddit:

Tourists love to think that they are not like other tourists.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

“Male loneliness epidemic” and it’s just karma and the consequences of their actions.

Spotted on Discord:

My brain has too many tabs open.

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