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Commentary:
"Selling drugs may not be explicitly mentioned in the Bible, but I'm pretty sure Jesus wouldn't approve of your 'miraculous' herb garden 😄💊 #DivineDeals"

bible, drugs, humor, interpretation, irony, point, religion, sell, single, tell

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

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2 months ago

awkward, awkward situation, bathroom, even, knock, privacy, protocol, say, situation, someone, stall
A blind guy felt my face and said, “Wonderful.”

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2 months ago

blind, blindness, compliment, face, guy, humor, perception, said, wonderful
Superwoman: Single. Batman: Single. Wonder Woman: Single. I get it now, I’m single because I’m a superhero.

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2 months ago

Batman, dating, humor, i, irony, relationship, single, superhero, superwoman, woman, wonder, wonder woman
Every CVS has its own unique energy that’s powerful enough to exalt or destroy the individual.

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4 weeks ago

CVS, destroy, energy, enough, every, exalt, experience, individual, own, powerful, powerful energy, store, store experience, unique, unique energy
Who wants to do all my adult stuff for me today?

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5 months ago

adult, delegation, humor, me, procrastination, responsibility, stuff, today, wants
When the Beatles say, “Come together, right now, over me,” what was that about? Why did they say that?

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2 months ago

Beatles, humor, interpretation, lyric, lyric interpretation, me, music, over, right, say, song, song lyric, The Beatles, together, why

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Messenger this month:

High school crushes were crazy because, why the hell was I running all over school just to catch a glimpse of him.

62 shares on Threads this month:

If your boyfriend insists he rolls everywhere because it’s ‘faster than walking’, you may be dating a gamer.

23 shares on Pinterest this month:

Men only have money the first month of dating, that’s recruitment budget, never confuse it with operational budget.

62 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.

99 shares on Messenger this month:

The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.

89 shares on LinkedIn this month:

On the internet, you can be anything you want. It’s strange that so many people choose to be stupid.

23 shares on Instagram this month:

I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.

78 shares on Facebook this month:

I have nothing in common with people who “forget to eat”.

13 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m done with dating sites and am now only focusing on food delivery people. They have a job, a car, and most importantly food.

70 shares on Twitch this month:

No revenge, because to know me only as a memory is to suffer.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

I haven’t bought 1 Christmas gift but I got 3 packages on the way for me though.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Sleeping in is the most efficient way to find out which morning rituals you can actually do without.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

Naturally introverted, selectively extroverted.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Nature is fascinating. A dandelion makes it through concrete, while I get my head stuck in my sweater in the morning.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

If you’re going through hell, keep going.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

No revenge, because losing someone like me is enough.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

Sorry, can’t go out tonight. My bed told me it needs me, and I can’t let it down.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I hope the aliens aren’t good at basketball. My chances of making it into the NBA are already slim.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

You give my middle finger an erection.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

The only way three people can keep a secret is if two of them are dead.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I hate the person I become when I try to open a package using the ‘Tear Here’ notch, and it stays sealed.

Shared recently on Facebook:

If I could have immunity to anything I would pick calories.

Just shared via YouTube:

Billionaires didn’t get rich by working harder. They got rich by making sure you work harder, get paid less, and spend more.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Incorrectly is the only word that, when spelled correctly, is still spelled incorrectly.

Live now on Slack:

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Just did a seductive hair flip and an onion ring flew out.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

My first instinct when I see an animal is to say “hello.” My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.

Shared recently on X:

All I do is go to work, come home, blink and suddenly I’m back at work.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

If you want to impress me with your car, it should be an ice cream van.

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Activity Log ✨

At no single point in the Bible does it tell you not to sell drugs.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

A blind guy felt my face and said, “Wonderful.”

Superwoman: Single. Batman: Single. Wonder Woman: Single. I get it now, I’m single because I’m a superhero.

Every CVS has its own unique energy that’s powerful enough to exalt or destroy the individual.

Who wants to do all my adult stuff for me today?

When the Beatles say, “Come together, right now, over me,” what was that about? Why did they say that?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨