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Commentary:
Looks like someone just received a terminal prognosis of eternal wedded bliss! 💍💉 Better stock up on some "Yes, dear" pills and prepare for a lifetime of "happily ever after" prescriptions! 😉 #PrescribedForLove

diagnose, doctor, doctors, future, humor, marriage, me, relationship, wife

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“There are no words in the English language that have all the vowels in alphabetical order,” he said facetiously.

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2 months ago

alphabetical, alphabetical order, English, English language, facetious, humor, joke, language, language joke, order, said, vowel, vowels, wordplay, words
Either the tables are going to turn, or I’m going to flip them.

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6 months ago

expression, flip, going, humor, idiom, table, tables, turn, wordplay
You know shit’s about to get real when I put on yoga pants before dessert.

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2 months ago

before, casual, dessert, fitness, food, humor, i, know, pants, put, real, snack, yoga
The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

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2 months ago

age-related, aging, comedy, exist, grumpy, humor, i, men, old, old men, older, understand, understanding, why
Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

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2 months ago

amount, before, breakup, dating, evil, evil ex, ex, experience, humor, love, meet, need, normal, normal ex, offer, relationship, right, serious, situationship, spouse, three, truly
Cracking the ice cubes out probably feels so good for the ice tray.

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2 months ago

cracking, cube, funny observation, good, household, humor, ice, ice cube, ice tray, kitchen, observation, playful, satisfaction, tray

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on Facebook this month:

So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’

87 shares on X this month:

August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

24 shares on X this month:

If you don’t have a favorite spatula yet, you still have some growing up to do.

64 shares on Pinterest this month:

I always sit in the middle stall so I have a bathroom buddy.

22 shares on YouTube this month:

Is ‘ugh’ an emotion? Because I fell it all the time.

90 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night.

63 shares on Slack this month:

This meeting could have been a painting in a museum of boredom.

62 shares on Slack this month:

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

37 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I can actually be quite charming if you would let me out of the guillotine.

33 shares on Discord this month:

Just another day of not being hot and rich.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

“I’m at a point in my life where I don’t go anywhere unless I absolutely have to.”

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Difference between a flirt and harassment: if you are handsome, it’s a flirt, if you are ugly, it’s harassment.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

My favorite yoga pose is the one where you eat a sandwich.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Dropped my skinny boyfriend between the bed and the wall like a vape or a TV remote.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

Wearing shorts and my pale legs screamed at the sensation of sunlight like vampires.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

I put the mess in domestic.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you talk on speakerphone in public, everyone around you hates you.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

(guy who’s not even that into you) I love you.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

It’s now socially acceptable again to clap when the plane lands.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

Tip on how best to start a conversation with me: Not at all.

Seen just now on WeChat:

There are always new uncomplimentary angles to view yourself from. Keep contorting!

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Life hack: You don’t need white noise to sleep when you have constant ringing in your ears.

Just shared via WeChat:

People are always saying “not today, Satan” but what if we just hear him out.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I’m opening a secret ice cream club called The Inside Scoop.

Spotted on X:

If we date and break up, you gotta unlearn all my lingo and cool shit that I taught you. You gotta go back to being lame.

Spotted on WeChat:

Dear predictive text, I am tired of sending people “Thanksgiving” when they send me a recipe or directions.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Spotted on Pinterest:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Doctors diagnosed me as your future wife.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

“There are no words in the English language that have all the vowels in alphabetical order,” he said facetiously.

Either the tables are going to turn, or I’m going to flip them.

You know shit’s about to get real when I put on yoga pants before dessert.

The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

Cracking the ice cubes out probably feels so good for the ice tray.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨