Trendy Funny Quotes

  • At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.
  • Ever woken up, kissed the person sleeping next to you and felt glad to be alive? I just did, so I won’t be catching this train again.
  • I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.
  • I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.
  • Having a teenager is fun because the voice in my head that questions everything I do now has a friend.
  • I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.