Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Food is like sex: When you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good.
  • Once I find a dragon, y’all are toast.
  • Hear me out, a Q-Tip that doesn’t bounce out the trash can when you throw it away.
  • “Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?
  • Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.
  • When Hulk wrecks shit he’s “incredible.” When I do it I’m “causing a scene” and “need to leave this place immediately.”