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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Men with bibles names be the worst type of people.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

I put the dance in “Good riddance!”

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Is it a good sign when your therapist keeps saying Ka-Ching?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

I’m 6 donuts away from being the elephant in the room.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

After all the books are banned, they’ll move on to suggestive fruit.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

After overthinking about it for 6 hours, I have decided that it’s actually not that big of a deal.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

If a beer is 8 bucks, it’s a show. If a beer is 14 bucks, it’s a concert.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

777 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,939

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,939

49 minutes ago

3,421

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Discord:

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

Just landed via Twitch:

Some people stay in the past because that’s where they peaked.

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m at the age where any time my mom asks if I remember so-and-so from high school, the news is never good.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.

Making waves on WeChat:

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I probably think this song is about me.

Trending via Threads:

Who called it asking the waiter about the specials and not retrieving data from the server?

Live now on Messenger:

Probably the worst thing you can do when your wife gives you a disapproving look from across the room for being on your phone is finish typing this.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

No one my age is single because they’re all unhappily married.

Going viral on Reddit:

I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.

Every retail employee should get to hit one customer a year and there is no way for customers to tell if they’ve used it yet.

6 months ago

Every retail employee should get to hit one customer a year and there is no way for customers to tell if they’ve used it yet.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Well, that would definitely make customer service a lot more interesting! 😂 Imagine walking into a store not knowing if today is the day you'll get bopped on the head for being a difficult shopper. 🛒💢 Just another reason to be extra nice to retail staff! 🤣 #CustomerServiceGoals"

customer, customers, employee, every, hit, humor, retail, satisfaction, should, stress, tell, used, workplace, year, yearly

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share → : You should be able to google why a couple broke up.
6 months ago
Share → : I wish I had a friend like me.
5 months ago
Share → : In a relationship with my heated car seat.
6 months ago
Share → : Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.
2 weeks ago
Share → : Well, that’s not very in love with me of you.
5 months ago
Share → : As a proud husband and father in my 40s, my New Year’s resolution is to sneeze even louder this year.
5 months ago
Share → : Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.
6 months ago
Share → : At Christmas time, all outstanding invoices are always transferred with the reference “Hohoho”.

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

777 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,939

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,939

49 minutes ago

3,419

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

If he has other girls who make him smile, be different and make him cry.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Plants are like “I’ll have a light lunch.”

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

I miss my bed. Why does it have to be so far from where I work?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

We’d never met, or even spoken, but I could tell just from gazing into her pale blue eyes I had stepped on her toe.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

I treat people the way I want to be treated by not leaving the house.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 40s. Your bra wins the Oscar for the best actor in a supportive role.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

I woke up, got out of bed, and had coffee. I think that’s enough for one day.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

We go together like coffee and cigarettes.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Sick of people thinking the Midwest is just a bunch of small towns and cornfields when they forgot it’s also a lot of road construction, inconsistent weather, and deer that jump in front of your car.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

I’ve learned a lot over the years, but the best advice I can ever give someone is never buy a used harmonica.

Just shared via WeChat:

Suicide is never the answer, you gotta outlive your enemies.

Just shared via WeChat:

There’s no need to put a little umbrella in my drink. It’s already wet.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Men look so amazing for people who use the same product for their teeth, hair, floor and car washing.

Going viral on Facebook:

She was my chai, I was her cake rusk.

Spotted on Facebook:

When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.

Trending via Messenger:

I’m so sick of these little 30-minute weekends.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Guys have good pics on their dating profiles because their ex took them.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Love triangle? You mean this Dorito?

Live now on WeChat:

There’s nothing like the excitement of a brand-new book to add to the massive pile of books I still haven’t read.

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