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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

If you like Christmas so much, why don’t you merry it?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I have found that there is usually a lot of day left at the end of my patience.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren’t happy.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

You want me to go apple picking? The original sin?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

My love language is caffeine and being left alone until I’m kind again.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

I’m not built to work, I’m built to brood in a castle with all my unread books.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

“I asked Grok. I asked ChatGPT.” Yeah, well, I asked my mom. She said no.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

810 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,972

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,972

Updated

35 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

I can’t afford a vehicle with wing doors, so I buy the Tupperware with lids which open that way.

Just shared via Snapchat:

If you make it through life without being portrayed in a murder documentary, take the win.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I wasn’t planning on moving, but I was just invited to the neighborhood fall potluck, so I guess now I have no choice.

Live now on Instagram:

90% of the ocean is unexplored, which means there could be a McDonald’s down there.

Making waves on Threads:

I wish more dumb people were shy.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Hey, you should start your own business and then mind it.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

What an awful time to be even remotely aware of what is going on in the world.

Spotted on Messenger:

Girl, if the moon can block the sun, then you can definitely block your ex.

Shared recently on WeChat:

It’s so cold outside I saw a gangster pull his pants up and walk stiffly.

Going viral on YouTube:

I’m not addicted to coffee. We’re just very close.

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Funny federal agency quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

810 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,972

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,972

Updated

35 minutes ago

Users Online

3,450

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

I wanna be crazy rich. I’m already crazy, so I’m half way there.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Whoever named the meatball absolutely nailed it.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

I’m tired of adding ‘LOL’ to the end of my texts for sensitive people.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

My bad habits got renewed for another season.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

I now feel I’ve watched enough reruns of The Shawshank Redemption on basic cable that I’ll be able to successfully make it in prison.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

In honor of the fall equinox, I will also be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

If you’re cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and continue to participate in family game night.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

She asked to see where the magic happens, so I showed her my sandwich maker.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Opening up is like talking to a cop: anything you say can and will be used against you.

Making waves on Discord:

The purpose of life is to go insane sooner or later.

Reported on Snapchat:

I’m bored, but not read a book for fun bored.

Spotted on Discord:

At what point is a salad no longer a salad based on how much bacon I add?

Making waves on Pinterest:

No, no, I’m listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once.

Shared recently on Slack:

Wonder what I should wear to World War III.

Trending via Slack:

Kendrick inspires me to be a bigger, deeper, more passionate hater.

Shared recently on TikTok:

That awkward moment when someone is doing the dishes, and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

Making waves on Discord:

My day starts backwards, I wake up tired and I go to bed wide awake.

Breaking via Instagram:

Being on Twitter right now is like playing the violin on the Titanic, except we are also making fun of the iceberg and the iceberg is getting genuinely mad.

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