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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Nostalgia is mostly dumb nonsense, but movie rental stores were legitimately better than streaming.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Too poor for Ozempic but too undisciplined for strict diet and exercise. Is there a secret third option?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Just spent a couple seconds concerned about the sounds my stomach was making before realizing it was a motorcycle outside.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Most people don’t listen at all, they just wait until they can continue talking.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

“Why would I lie to you?” I don’t know, maybe because you’re a liar.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

The point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. That’s it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on X:

Best threesome: me, my bed and my pillow.

Reported on WhatsApp:

I didn’t expect to have such strong feelings when the subtitles said “smooching” while the actors were kissing.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’ll let you guys know if the psych ward has wifi.

Trending via TikTok:

Trying to bribe Monday with coffee to get it to act like a Friday.

Just landed via Snapchat:

HR has told me to stop saying ‘How stupid can you be?’ to members of staff. They’re worried it’s being taken as a challenge.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

Spotted on X:

Imagine hearing the ice cream truck music, but at night.

Shared recently on Telegram:

There’s something about Dracula I just don’t trust.

Just shared via Twitch:

Hot girls have a private Instagram account with 20 followers.

Just landed via X:

If you get hangovers, it’s because you drank the beers with impure intentions and heavy karmic debt.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,433

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

Do you think birds, once they get older, start people-watching?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

When a lady compliments your facial hair, have the goddamn decency to compliment hers.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

During arguments with idiots, I wish I could throw a flash bang and disappear.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Some people are like sunglasses: your day just becomes so much brighter when you accidentally drop them off the side of the boat.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I don’t even know what I’d do if a sailor called me a landlubber. I’d probably lose my cool.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

I march to the beat of my own dumb.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

I’m always looking for new and exciting ways to give up.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Salt and pepper shakers add an air of mystique to any bathroom.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

Even worse than a spider is a spider that just disappeared.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

I’m so thankful I live on the planet that has pizza.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

I wish I could invoice people for wasting my time.

Shared recently on Slack:

Returned my 3D printer, but not before making a 3D printer with it.

Trending via Slack:

I don’t get vegetables on my pizza because I don’t like mixing business with pleasure.

Breaking via X:

I’m giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I’m giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I think you’re like the cat’s meow, annoying yet sweet.

Going viral on Discord:

Dating is just wondering why someone is single and then slowly figuring it out.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

The best part about filling out doctor appointment forms online is when you get there and they say “hello, please fill out these forms!”

Breaking via Threads:

I hate when people are like “you are so nice”. I’m ugly, I have no other choice.

Making waves on Pinterest:

In six days God created heaven and earth. On the seventh day, in the interests of balance, the BBC interviewed Satan.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

What’s a beginner hobby for someone just getting into being happy?

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