Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your credit card from your purse.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

The rainforest cafe won’t be authentic enough for me if they don’t bulldoze 40% of the restaurant while I’m there.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

There should be a good 10 hours in between waking up and having to interact with people.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

If you break up with the same person enough times, you eventually get married. Never give up.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Situation monitoring is not for the uncaffeinated.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

“I’m not jealous of nobody but stay-at-home wives who are married to wealthy men.”

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

It’s Monday, proceed with caution.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

I can’t take people who pronounce “gnocchi” correctly seriously.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

What song lyric resonates with you the most? Mine is “we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little loony”

Shared recently on YouTube:

That awkward moment when you have to pretend that you like the gift.

Spotted on Telegram:

I’m not “late”, I’m just very creative with my interpretation of “time”.

Spotted on Messenger:

Does my career know that I’m pursuing it, or is it another one-sided relationship?

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Sometimes I think I’m too old to make a career change. But then I remember how Walter White went from high school teacher to drug kingpin. Anything is possible!

Seen just now on Telegram:

I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.

Live now on Messenger:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to flirt today.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Just shared via Pinterest:

There are 8 billion people in the world and I only have 3 friends, and one is annoying.

Breaking via WeChat:

My boss told me “It’s not rocket science.” Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science.

Funny giant magnet quotes

New funny giant magnet quotes 👇

The Velvet Underground probably wouldn’t have been so influential if I was at their shows with a giant magnet and pulled their guitars out of their hands.

5 days ago

band, concert, giant, giant magnet, guitar, hands, humor, i, influence, magnet, music, shows, The Velvet Underground, underground, velvet

All funny giant magnet quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on Slack this month:

Mornings would be fine if they started later.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

52 shares on Snapchat this month:

Maybe if we paid our streaming services even more, they could stop jacking up the volume on the commercials they make us watch, even though we are paying for the service.

67 shares on X this month:

I have read the room and decided to be illiterate.

48 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’ll marry the person who can go to a family event with me and still like me afterward.

46 shares on Twitch this month:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

39 shares on Reddit this month:

Growing up means choosing cozy couch moments over crowded club scenes. Cheers to adulting!

19 shares on Discord this month:

Haircuts should be covered by insurance.

73 shares on X this month:

You’re never alone. There’s mold.

41 shares on Discord this month:

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Here’s your daily reminder to not forget about Dre.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

The bank just called and gave me the biggest compliment, said my balance is outstanding. I really needed that today.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Are you spaghetti because I want you to meat my balls?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

I think it’s time when we buy new clothes that we have the option to buy the body they’re being modelled in too.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Why can’t my fat leave me like everything else does?

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Let me seduce you with my knowledge on useless things.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I smile at all animals, just not the human ones.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Dollar Tree need to just go ahead and change the name to Tree of Unexpected Prices.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

If you’ve never been hit with gay allegations, you’re not fly enough.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

Suffering from a forehead kisses deficiency (self-diagnosed).

Seen just now on Messenger:

Reverse cowgirl so I can bend backward and look at him like the Exorcist.

Trending via Slack:

…and so ends another week of me not becoming unexpectedly rich.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Honestly, I don’t think I have any more new passwords left in me. You wanna steal my identity? Go ahead, I hope you enjoy debt and terrible posture.

Just shared via Telegram:

Which one of you shrunk all of my jeans?

Trending via TikTok:

Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

Shared recently on X:

Work again? Really? Didn’t I just do that yesterday?

Shared recently on Messenger:

I don’t think humans were put on this earth to know what Salesforce is. It’s unnatural.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Honestly, I can see why God flooded the Earth that one time.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny giant magnet quotes

New funny giant magnet quotes 👇

The Velvet Underground probably wouldn’t have been so influential if I was at their shows with a giant magnet and pulled their guitars out of their hands.

All funny giant magnet quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨