Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

I always mean what I say, I don’t always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

I need a room full of mirrors, so I can be surrounded by losers.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Not opening up anymore, have fun trying to figure me out.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

This body is a temple; I suicide bomb every day.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Not arguing with a man that can cook. Whatever you say, handsome.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

I can admit that I am intrigued by people weirder than I am.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Shout-out to the lifeguard who recommended moving the potato to the front of my Speedo.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

The pumpkin was invented in 1942 when a watermelon put on a pair of corduroys.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

If you see me looking zoned out, it’s because I’m having a therapy session with myself in my head.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2393 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,555

Funny Quotes Topics

15,234

Funny Quotes Images

12,555

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,456

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

God, I wish I had enough money to discover it doesn’t make me happy.

Just shared via Slack:

I’m already excited about who I’m going to think sucks first today.

Just landed via Twitch:

I could never be an Instagram mom influencer. For starters, I wouldn’t be able to give my kids a name like Banjo or Parmesan or Chandelier.

Trending via Snapchat:

No matter how early you get up, fate always gets up half an hour earlier.

Making waves on Telegram:

Saw a big spider crawl into my closet last night. He’s probably in there trying on all my clothes, acting like he’s me.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

You’re really hot. Wanna share microplastics?

Seen just now on X:

Weirdos gonna weird.

Just landed via Messenger:

Our pronunciation of the word “colonel” does feel like group psychosis.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I’m planning to save money on Christmas gifts this year by wrapping up all the toys my toddler dropped behind the couch.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I had zero respect for my boss until he started appearing exclusively by hologram.

Home » Funny Not Having Quotes

Funny not having quotes

New funny not having quotes 👇

For even more funny not having quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny not having quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2393 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,555

Funny Quotes Topics

15,234

Funny Quotes Images

12,555

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,449

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

If love is the answer then what was the question?

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Every time a Taco Bell rings, an angel gets diarrhea.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Why does the phone ring longer when you’re ignoring the call?

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Girls will be like “it’s fine” then start drawing a pentagram in blood on their floorboards.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

A person’s character can be read quite reliably from the way he or she interacts with service personnel.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I don’t need a midlife crisis. My whole life is a crisis.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Wishing all the contacts in my phone “Merry Christmas, I hope you get what you deserve” and just letting that work itself out.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

I quit boxing the moment I realized my opponent was allowed to punch me in the face, too.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

Guy inventing jogging: how can I suffer, but with music?

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Discord:

Turning regret into ulcers since the day I was born.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I wear sunglasses when I’m driving so nobody knows I’m asleep.

Making waves on Slack:

Dear brain, please stop thinking so much exactly when it’s time to fall asleep.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I can clean the whole house if I want to, but if someone asks me to do it, suddenly I’m lazy.

Reported on TikTok:

They should invent crushes that like you back.

Shared recently on Slack:

As a dad, you’re required to ask your neighbor “You gonna do mine next?” when you see them raking leaves.

Freshly posted on X:

I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

Trending via Instagram:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Reported on YouTube:

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

Just shared via Discord:

If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴