180 funny office quotes - Page 5 - Wordgag

Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

Mar 30, 2026

Dear unsuccessful applicant, we ultimately decided to split the role between existing staff without paying any of them extra.

Mar 30, 2026

Apparently, stress balls are not supposed to be thrown at people who are stressing you out.

Mar 30, 2026

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Mar 30, 2026

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the work of 3-5 people.

Mar 30, 2026

When I get bored on a Zoom meeting, I put a cursor under the speaker’s nose to make it look like they have a booger.

Mar 30, 2026

People who say “teamwork makes the dream work” are the reason that some people want to punch other people in the face.

Mar 30, 2026

“PTO” stands for “prepare the others” because you’re not gonna be there.

Mar 30, 2026

Literally no one understands something more completely than a woman in a meeting who starts a question with “Just so I understand …”

Mar 30, 2026

Unfortunately, free coffee in the office will never hit like a $9 iced latte will.

Mar 30, 2026

Working my first office job. Is it normal to have nothing to do?

Mar 30, 2026

I really think my coworkers and I deserve an Oscar for acting like everything at work is fine.

Mar 30, 2026

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a long weekend.

Mar 30, 2026

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

Mar 30, 2026

When I retire, I’m going to run for office.

Mar 30, 2026

Employees should have to take their boss’s last name.

Mar 30, 2026

I can literally trace the moment my career died back to when my boss said he was in back-to-back meetings, and I said, “Isn’t face-to-face better?”

Mar 30, 2026

Why steal office supplies from work when you could take an extra-long bathroom break and steal company time instead?

Mar 30, 2026

Coworker: Where are you going after work? Me: Away from you.

Mar 30, 2026

Microsoft Teams needs to add a “spank” reaction for when I want to reprimand my employees during a video call.

Mar 30, 2026