Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

“I’m just a girl!” No, you are a monster.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

The best proof that fairy tales are fictional is the fact that the prince is always an intelligent and handsome single man.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Not gonna lie, toddlers absolutely nailed it with naps, buttered noodles, and rejecting authority.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Can you turn your swag off for one second and listen?

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I hate when someone you love says mean things like, “It’s time to wake up.”

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

I hope none of the people I vowed to “help hide a body” ever actually need my help.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

First World War. Kind of nervous.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

You can have glossy lips or you can have a cat. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

I realized being an adult is just feeling too tired to function, and then functioning.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,286

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

Imagine a refund on all the money you spent on alcohol.

Trending via Reddit:

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you. Ironically, smoking bacon will cure it.

Just landed via Snapchat:

If I was a mythical creature, I’d be a Sighclops.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Seen just now on Instagram:

My favorite type of gender reveal is the one where they just tell me and I don’t have to go to a party to find out.

Just shared via Discord:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my wife some months ago, where would you be hiding?

Making waves on Threads:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Santa has the right idea: only visit people once a year, eat a snack, leave early.

Just landed via Discord:

I broke up with the gym. We were just not working out.

Funny try it all quotes

New funny try it all quotes 👇

“Try it all before you die” is always drugs and sex, never quantum physics.

3 weeks ago

advice, always, before, die, drug, drugs, humor, life, life advice, never, physics, quantum, quantum physics, sex, try, try it all

All funny try it all quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

93 shares on Messenger this month:

Dating apps aren’t working, time to start drinking beer and eating hot dogs along the first base line at a baseball game.

73 shares on Instagram this month:

Thinking of starting a religion around cheese.

79 shares on Facebook this month:

You were promised to me 3,000 years ago.

82 shares on X this month:

There should be significant punishments for people at the grocery store with no spatial awareness.

76 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?

44 shares on Twitch this month:

Yesterday, thieves broke into my home. They searched everywhere and found nothing. They beat me up, telling me to work harder.

59 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m so hungry, I could eat my own cooking.

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

Whoever told you there’s no such thing as a stupid question lied.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

It’s almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

I don’t get treadmills, I mean if I walk I better reach somewhere.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

The earlier you wake up, the more time you have to think about why you wish you were still asleep in bed.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Hannibal Lecter didn’t have to be a serial killer, he was scary enough as a foodie.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

The only downside to dating hot men is that when it ends, he’s still hot.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Soft launching your call out the next day by telling everyone at work your stomach feels a little weird.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

I feel a deep connection to librarians because I also love telling people to shut up.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

The cheapest way to fly is off the handle.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

First caveman to see fire: Well, this is a buncha bullshit that no one needs (stomps it out) and I predict that’s the last I’ll ever see of that.

Going bananas on Facebook:

I believe the IRS is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Making waves on Discord:

I love when really expensive products say, “apply generously,” like, of course, you would say that.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Wanted to update everybody on my diet. I’ve decided it’s okay to be fat.

Live now on WeChat:

I don’t run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone, and ignore them like all other adults.

Spotted on Twitch:

In these difficult times, it’s important to remember that cheese exists.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Why trust atoms? Because they’ve never been caught fibbing, just fission.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

Going viral on Reddit:

I now also have a device that tells me whether I’ve taken enough steps today. If I don’t make it one day, it barks and poops in my apartment.

Trending via Messenger:

I put the hot in psychotic.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny try it all quotes

New funny try it all quotes 👇

“Try it all before you die” is always drugs and sex, never quantum physics.

All funny try it all quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨