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Commentary:
"Smooth jazz really pushing the boundaries of patience, huh? 🎷🤔 Keep holding on, the hold music symphony isn't over yet! 🎶😅 #SmoothJazzTorture"

cell, cell phone, company, give, give up, hold, hold music, humor, interest, jazz, lose, music, phone, play, smooth, smooth jazz, working

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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54 shares on X this month:

A simple “hi” can be the beginning of two years of therapy.

67 shares on TikTok this month:

Any room can be a bathroom if you hate the person who’s house you’re in.

76 shares on Discord this month:

Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

73 shares on Threads this month:

I’ve learned my lesson so many times that I could be a teacher.

96 shares on Reddit this month:

There is still plenty of room in my heart, but the bouncer has become a little stricter in recent years.

30 shares on Instagram this month:

If alcohol was the one that was banned instead of weed, then a lot of people would have had memories of hungry, stoned fathers instead of angry, drunk ones.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

Next time I die, I’m going to make sure I’m reincarnated someplace other than Earth.

12 shares on Facebook this month:

“Don’t take this the wrong way!” Translation: Prepare for insult.

73 shares on Reddit this month:

Having to choose between an old guy or a convicted felon is a perfect depiction of what dating apps are Iike.

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You can count the number of times my wife has agreed with me on one hand, if you don’t have fingers.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

70% of the planet is covered in water, yet here I am drowning in bullshit.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Your pronouns are “side/chick”.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

If I don’t text you saying Happy New Year, we still gang, I’m just lazy.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

Caveman: I just invented the wheel. Journalist: Here’s why the wheel is bad for humanity.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

I hope one day I will sleep before midnight like normal humans do. Every day I sleep tomorrow, even yesterday I slept today.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

The oceans are rising because no one is drinking their recommended 8-12 glasses of water per day.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

If someone leaves your life, it’s often because the actor playing them is getting cancelled in the real world.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

“I asked Grok. I asked ChatGPT.” Yeah, well, I asked my mom. She said no.

Making waves on Threads:

Alexa, mute my children.

Live now on X:

Half princess, half menace.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

50% of parenting is just trying to decide if that noise is worth walking up all of those stairs.

Shared recently on Slack:

Why is experimental noise music always scary metallic noises and never fun sounds like people clapping and laughing and like bubbles and stuff?

Freshly posted on Slack:

Fellas, be sure to never ask a lady any questions on a date. This makes them feel interrogated. Strong declarative statements only.

Trending via TikTok:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’m glad the makers removed all the unnecessary sex scenes from my life, so I can focus on character development.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Great minds think alike, but so do stupid ones.

Spotted on Reddit:

Halloween is cool, but nothing is spookier than my previous choices in men.

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Activity Log ✨

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

I like when the superheroes that can fly pick up and carry the ones that can’t.

I would flirt with you, but I’d rather seduce you with my awkwardness.

If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.

Be so funny that everyone forgets that you are ugly!

God, I’m not trying to rush you for my soulmate; but could I get the tracking number?

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I like when the superheroes that can fly pick up and carry the ones that can’t.

I would flirt with you, but I’d rather seduce you with my awkwardness.

If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.

Be so funny that everyone forgets that you are ugly!

It’s important to get out of the house every once and a while to remind yourself of why you don’t go out.

God, I’m not trying to rush you for my soulmate; but could I get the tracking number?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨