Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Thunder is fake. It doesn’t even sync up properly with lightning. There’s some guy who waits till he sees lightning and then he presses the thunder button.
  • Ten million people accused me of exaggerating today.
  • Getting a nose ring, so I don’t lose my keys.
  • Eating fast food shouldn’t count for calories because it’s not around long enough.
  • I’m having a garage sale and hope people I’ve borrowed things from don’t come.
  • Don’t tell me about your wild weekend. My TV remote died and I switched the batteries around, and now it’s working.