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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

If you don’t know how many x-rays it takes before a person develops super powers, should you really be in a medical profession?

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Can hardly wait until my winter fat turns into spring rolls.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Please hesitate to get in touch with me.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

No matter how much Polynesian food you eat, you always want Samoa.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Everyone’s gangsta until grandma grabs that wooden spoon.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Coding: Where incessantly talking to yourself seems completely normal and debugging is like being a detective in a movie where you are both the detective and the perpetrator.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

I wish pets lived longer, and life wasn’t so expensive, and cake didn’t make you fat, and people weren’t twats.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

When the devil couldn’t reach me, he made my brain my biggest enemy.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

I’m at the age where I won’t make eye contact with someone because they look like a “talker.”

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

Don’t ever forget where you came from. That’s where you left your car.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2086 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,248

Funny Quotes Topics

14,988

Funny Quotes Images

12,248

2 minutes ago

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

Saw a shooting star and made a wish for everyone to stop talking to me.

Going viral on Reddit:

I held the door for an old person today and he was like, “didn’t we go to high school together” and we did.

Breaking via Telegram:

There are more bots on here than in Star Wars.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

He probably could have just called himself “Andre.” I think I would have figured out The Giant part on my own.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

They should invent a rest for the wicked.

Freshly posted on X:

Opening the web before 9am is crazy. Like, did you even try to have a good day?

Spotted on Telegram:

It’s freezing cold outside and my polar bear won’t start.

Shared recently on WeChat:

You don’t use a semicolons correctly; you use a semicolon confidently.

Reported on Pinterest:

I’m sorry for setting the impossible standards that the rest of you try to live up to.

Trending via LinkedIn:

If hot showers aren’t good for you then why do I emerge from them bright red like a beautiful ruby?

I don’t think the makers of protein powder have ever had chocolate.

6 months ago

I don’t think the makers of protein powder have ever had chocolate.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
“Apparently, the makers of protein powder missed out on the chocolate memo 🍫😆 Maybe they need a crash course in cocoa goodness before hitting the gym! 💪 #ChocoholicsAnonymous”

Fun Fact or Trivia:
Did you know that the flavor of chocolate protein powder was actually created in the 1950s by a chemist named Irwin H. Stone? 🍫💪 #ChocolateProteinPowderFact

chocolate, diet, ever, fitness, food, food humor, health, humor, i, irony, joke, makers, powder, protein, protein powder, think

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2086 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,248

Funny Quotes Topics

14,988

Funny Quotes Images

12,248

2 minutes ago

3,439

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

I can’t believe I was arrested for impersonating a politician. I was just sitting there doing nothing.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Meds have done more for me than any man ever could.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

“I’m going to try underthinking about a situation, and see if that works.”

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

You haven’t experienced proper anger until you have a sister.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Never in my life have I heard my dad sneeze at an acceptable volume.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

D was probably like “lmao ok” when they named the alphabet the ABCs

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Beavers are also just otters that have learned carpentry.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

If you don’t have a favorite spatula yet, you still have some growing up to do.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

“Stop bouncing your leg!” It’s either this or I start screaming.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

Seen just now on X:

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Apparently “ew no” is not an acceptable way to tell my boss I don’t want more responsibility at work.

Going viral on Slack:

My sleeping pattern ain’t even a pattern anymore, it’s a freestyle that’s on shuffle.

Spotted on Reddit:

I’m looking for a moisturizer to hide the fact that I’ve been tired since 2010.

Seen just now on YouTube:

They should invent going outside without people looking at you.

Seen just now on Threads:

Lounging under the stars is top-tier therapy.

Trending via Snapchat:

“Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I used to have this mental illness where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

Just shared via YouTube:

Been acting really busy today because I can tell my coworker wants to talk about something in his personal life.

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