Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

  • My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.
  • I rode around the block on my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.
  • Nothing is more fake than my friendliness on the phone at work.
  • Confucius says: “Those who drink a lot die earlier, but have seen twice as much in life.”
  • Apparently β€œew no” is not an acceptable way to tell my boss I don’t want more responsibility at work.
  • I have no desire to work now. I had five days off in a row where I dined at a feast and was entertained at a cinema. I have flown too high to return to a laptop.