Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Some people stay longer in a toilet than in a relationship.
  • I’m naturally funny cause my whole life is a joke.
  • Part of fatherhood is becoming an expert in some obscure topic and teaching it to your children who stopped listening 30 minutes ago.
  • Not much is worse than that feeling of going back to work after a lunch, or a vacation, or just going to work in general.
  • I only use ‘sir’ disrespectfully.
  • “Gravy is not a beverage.” Okay, well that’s why I was trying to drink it in the bathroom, so you wouldn’t see me.