Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'cookie chaser' diet technique – because nothing says 'healthy lifestyle' like using dessert to swallow your diet pill 🍪💊 Hopefully the cookies don't cancel out the pill! 😅"

cooky, diet, diet pill, eat, eating, food, help, humor, i, loss, nervous, pill, push, push down, stick, struggle, throat, weight, weight loss

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

God knew I’d be too powerful if He made me not annoying to women.

0

2 months ago

annoying, God, humor, ID, me, personality, powerful, relationship, too, woman, women
Pool rules: You’re not allowed to do anything that begins with the words ‘Hey everyone watch this!’

0

2 months ago

activity, everyone, fun, humor, pool, rule, safety, watch, words
Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

0

5 months ago

change, Cinderella, credit, credit score, finance, financial, financial joke, humor, i, joke, life, life change, night, night out, nightlife, personal, personal finance, score, spending
Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

0

2 months ago

35, age, age 35, best, borrow, borrow womb, friend, friendship, gay, gay best friend, girl, girls, humor, love, relationship, womb
Car rides by yourself with loud music… they’re good for the soul.

0

2 months ago

activity, car, car ride, fun, fun activity, good, health, loud, loud music, mental, mental health, music, relaxation, ride, self-care, solo, soul, yourself
I didn’t lose an hour of sleep. The hour of sleep lost me.

0

2 months ago

hour, humor, i, lose, loss, lost, me, perspective, sleep

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Telegram this month:

They should send the Epstein list to everyone’s phones like that U2 album.

95 shares on TikTok this month:

I give such good nudes that nobody ever needs to ask me for a second one.

32 shares on WeChat this month:

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

99 shares on Pinterest this month:

I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

25 shares on Snapchat this month:

One day we will tell our grandkids how far we had to scroll to get to the recipe.

55 shares on Threads this month:

Death cannot harm me more than you have harmed me, my beloved life.

10 shares on TikTok this month:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

Why do they have to make things childproof when I’m still functioning at a kindergarten level of dexterity?

79 shares on Facebook this month:

My comments on your home decor are not criticisms, they are deep concerns.

65 shares on X this month:

I just be minding my business, and next thing you know, a payment is due.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I truly wonder what it sounded like when Medusa washed her hair at night.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

Even if you like anime, you gotta still wear deodorant, man.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Women who don’t check a man’s phone will still use their intuition and dreams to find out if he’s cheating.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Having a mom who cooks good food is such a big flex.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

If you’re not dropping it like it’s hot, then what the hell are you doing?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

I can’t wait to open my phone tomorrow and find out what we’re mad about next.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Sometimes I wish I had a speed bump between my brain and my mouth.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

You were promised to me 3,000 years ago.

Freshly posted on Threads:

When my friends are religious, I pretend not to notice.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I autograph every hotel Bible I find with “Best wishes, JC”.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Life is just a series of obstacles preventing you from reading your book.

Trending via Facebook:

Every girl is defined by their one lost love. And by that I mean the one fast food item that was discontinued without warning, subsequently ruining their life.

Making waves on WeChat:

The local casino is hosting a speed dating event. Just what every woman needs, a new boyfriend with a gambling problem.

Spotted on X:

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

Making waves on Telegram:

Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Making waves on Twitch:

I knew the date was going well when we shared a glass of gravy with two straws.

Spotted on Slack:

That one British friend that’s too bloke.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m nervous that my diet pill will stick in my throat, so I usually eat a few cookies after to help push it down.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

God knew I’d be too powerful if He made me not annoying to women.

Pool rules: You’re not allowed to do anything that begins with the words ‘Hey everyone watch this!’

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

Car rides by yourself with loud music… they’re good for the soul.

I didn’t lose an hour of sleep. The hour of sleep lost me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨