Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Good news, I just decided I don’t care about anything anymore.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Zombies started running in movies and life has been chaotic since.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Apparently, when you treat people like they treat you, they get upset.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Good morning only to the complexity and uncertainty of everything.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Everyone’s gangsta till you’re waiting on your dog to poop.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m not “dating to marry” or “dating for fun.” I’m dating for a secret third reason.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

If overthinking burned calories, I’d never need to exercise again.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Actually, it’s illegal to be upset if you make a date on Halloween and they ghost you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2385 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,547

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,547

29 minutes ago

3,455

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Don’t worry, bro. She’s probably just working on a puzzle right now. She’ll get back to you.

Just shared via Discord:

I already want to take a nap tomorrow.

Shared recently on Threads:

I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.

Just shared via Reddit:

We got the Christmas tree yesterday, and now my wife knows that I was the chief architect working on the leaning tower of Pisa.

Shared recently on Discord:

Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?

Seen just now on Messenger:

One of my biggest faults is that when I ask someone their name, I forget to listen to what their name is.

Going viral on Slack:

I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

Seen just now on Instagram:

In the event of a water landing, place the life jacket over your head and swipe your credit card to inflate.

Just landed via Snapchat:

SEO experts be like: I was eating a banana when my traffic increased, so bananas are definitely a ranking factor.

Just shared via Snapchat:

If you wait until the last minute to do something, it only takes a minute to do it.

It’s not you. Just the things you say, think, and do.

6 months ago

It’s not you. Just the things you say, think, and do.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, I see we're playing the classic game of "It's not you, it's everything about you". 🤔💬 On the bright side, at least it's specific feedback, right? 🌟😅 Just a little something to keep in mind when you're planning your next stand-up comedy routine! 🎤🤣

honesty, humor, just, relationship, say, things, think

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2385 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,547

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,547

29 minutes ago

3,458

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m really good at compromising as long as I get my way.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

This gingerbread house isn’t even close to fire safety codes.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Please don’t ever speak to me about math. I’ve moved on.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Not having a crush is dangerous. What am I supposed to think about? What if I invent something?

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Driving to work, and I just reached down to touch my leg to make sure I have pants on.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

The key to looking amazing is looking like shit most of the time, so it’s more of a surprise.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Curious that talented athletes frequently credit God when they win, but we rarely see them blame God when they lose.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Life is weird and then you die.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

The winter months remind me that it is crucial to find someone that you’re thermostatically compatible with.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on YouTube:

Sticking googly eyes on a potato and introducing him to everyone as my new boyfriend.

Spotted on Telegram:

Most people in your life will come and go but occasionally you’ll meet someone really special who makes you contemplate murder.

Going viral on TikTok:

There’s a word in modern Hungarian slang, egérmozi, which describes watching films (or shows) on your phone. It means “mouse cinema”.

Seen just now on Slack:

Oops, I think I’ve had a little too much to think.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Half princess, half menace.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I’m going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life. l’ll call it my oughtabiography.

Going viral on Pinterest:

The heart wants what it wants, but it’s not the only organ that has a vote.

Just landed via Telegram:

Buying something nice for myself, cuz today would’ve been my birthday if I was born today.

Broadcasted on X:

What makes us human is selecting all images with traffic lights.

Seen just now on Reddit:

The most annoying child in our house is that of my mother-in-law.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴