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Commentary:
"Looks like even the Son of God can't escape the embarrassment of his browsing habits! 😅💻🙈 No wonder he needed a miracle to rise again! #ClearYourHistoryJesus"

browser, clear, forgot, grave, history, humor, Jesus, joke, religion, resurrection, rose, tech

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

0

2 months ago

always, cheeseburger, food, heart, humor, i, love, me, mixed, mixed signals, relationship, signals, understand, women
“What’s something you’d tell your younger self?” You can have ice cream for dinner, nobody will stop you.

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2 months ago

advice, cream, dinner, freedom, fun, ice, ice cream, indulgence, nobody, self, stop, tell, younger, younger self
I’m very strong, but not in a get a jar open kinda way.

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2 months ago

context, humor, jar, open, self-deprecation, strength, strong
My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.

0

2 months ago

away, chess, eating, every, humor, look away, pieces, strategy, time
I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions.

0

2 months ago

alcohol, bad, bad decision, choices, decision, humor, i, life, life choices, need, self-awareness
Hey! (with the intention of going back to sleep)

0

2 months ago

back, going, humor, intention, laziness, morning, procrastination, sleep, wake, wake up

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on Snapchat this month:

“You replied so quickly.” God forbid I wait like a dog to hear from you again.

81 shares on Telegram this month:

If stores want to accurately display clothes for people over 40, the mannequins should be laying on a couch.

71 shares on Pinterest this month:

I love cute tiny purses, but I’m sad to say I can never be a cute tiny purse girl. I need to haul my hoard of objects everywhere I go, because what if….

82 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t like people who take drugs, for example: airport security.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

Laziness is the art to rest before one gets tired.

33 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Went to an antique show and people started bidding on me.

38 shares on Threads this month:

A gambler is only called an addict when he loses.

81 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but that much caffeine can’t be good for you.

60 shares on Twitch this month:

I want my name to come up when you go to confession.

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

Instead of screaming into the void, I’m going to ask it for recipes.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

A designated hitter in baseball is the one who has to hit for everyone in case the team is drunk.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

Social media is a great way to make new enemies.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

I’ve jogged with my jogging pants about as often as I’ve rolled through the kitchen with kitchen roll.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Girls be like, “I know a spot,” then sacrifice you under the full moon.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Imagine you’re living inside a tiny mushroom house… with a tiny chimney… deep in the woods… no one knows you exist… you make soup in a tiny pot… you are free.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Looks fade but dark, twisted, inappropriate humor is forever.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

I may join the cicadas this summer and just scream for six weeks straight.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

It’s interesting growing up and discovering that most adults are not that clever. I had my suspicions as a kid but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Making waves on Instagram:

I don’t do exercise because one time I kneed myself in the face doing a burpee.

Just shared via Messenger:

The collective noun for a group of reply guys is an audacity.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

If I was ever told to “dress to impress”, my first thought would be to get the Batman suit out.

Just landed via Telegram:

Men want to meet up too easily. What if I plan to sacrifice you?

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Let’s all be grateful for a moment that stupidity is not contagious.

Trending via TikTok:

I suspect that you don’t lose weight during sport because of the exercise, but because you can’t eat anything during this time.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Just landed via Twitch:

Worst part of being in my 20’s is to be reminded that I’m actually in my mid-40’s.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

“What’s something you’d tell your younger self?” You can have ice cream for dinner, nobody will stop you.

I’m very strong, but not in a get a jar open kinda way.

My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.

I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions.

Hey! (with the intention of going back to sleep)

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨