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Commentary:
"Good news for antique doll collectors! 🎎 Keep calm and carry on with your doll collection – they're probably too busy looking fabulous to plan any murderous schemes! 🪆🔪 #DollsJustWannaHaveFun"

actually, antique, attack, doll, fear, human, humans, humor, irony, majority, murder, people, porcelain, porcelain doll, rare, rarity, shark, shark attack

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28 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m always a little mean to men because, if you treat them like humans, they think you wanna sleep with them.

26 shares on Telegram this month:

I bet oiling and wrapping potatoes in aluminum foil feels so good for the potato.

25 shares on Messenger this month:

Spent most of the day making sure my couch still works. So far so good.

15 shares on Messenger this month:

No one flirts better than a guy who’s not interested in you.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you want people to have kind words when you pass, you should say kind words when you’re alive.

47 shares on Telegram this month:

I drive like I’m immortal.

81 shares on Snapchat this month:

People who talk about fruit having too much sugar scare me so bad. Please get back, you wicked witch!

45 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s amazing how much I accomplish around the house right before someone is coming over.

95 shares on Twitch this month:

Billionaires didn’t get rich by working harder. They got rich by making sure you work harder, get paid less, and spend more.

13 shares on Messenger this month:

Roses are red, tacos are delicious. I use paper plates, ’cause I hate doing dishes.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

My playlist is so random, I be heartbroken, thugged out, and yeehaw all at the same time.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

There are only two portion sizes for mashed potatoes: nowhere near enough (posh restaurants) or far, far too much (literally everyone else).

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI take a 30-minute poop right after clocking in.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Another beautiful day, ruined by responsibility.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Went for a run this morning. That bee was huge!

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

I don’t need to grow a thick skin. The world needs to grow fewer thorns.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

I can’t do the splits. But so far there has never been a situation where I’ve thought, “I should do the splits now.”

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

The worst part of all-you-can-eat buffets are all the witnesses.

Shared recently on TikTok:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

Going viral on YouTube:

Hey, boy, are you the worst-case scenario? Because you’re all I think about.

Spotted on YouTube:

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I love how unforgiving soy sauce is. Cause you know immediately when you did too much with her.

Spotted on Instagram:

If you think I’m rude, you should hear the voices in my head.

Just shared via Reddit:

Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.

Seen just now on Threads:

Prison pen pal doesn’t want us to write each other anymore. Finds my life too depressing.

Seen just now on Discord:

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Going viral on Facebook:

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

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Activity Log ✨

Like shark attacks on humans, it’s actually extremely rare. The majority of antique, porcelain headed dolls aren’t interested in murdering people.

“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.

And then there are those dates after which you think: “Have I really shaved my legs for this?”

The lion can’t keep living like this.

There I was, quietly reliving my dream of having my own house, when suddenly I was attacked by insane prices.

Jealous that my phone can just die for a little while.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Like shark attacks on humans, it’s actually extremely rare. The majority of antique, porcelain headed dolls aren’t interested in murdering people.

Keep the laugh going 😂

“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.

And then there are those dates after which you think: “Have I really shaved my legs for this?”

The lion can’t keep living like this.

There I was, quietly reliving my dream of having my own house, when suddenly I was attacked by insane prices.

“Can my boyfriend come?” Will he contribute to our conversation, at least one question?

Jealous that my phone can just die for a little while.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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