Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • You’re always bitching about your alarm clock, but put yourself in his shoes. The first thing he sees in the morning is your face.
  • They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.
  • I might not be able to speak another language but I can speak English slower!
  • Doing all of this just to die in the end! LMAO!
  • I’m not asking for a lot, I just want someone down to earth that’s gonna touch me all over like my shower curtain does.
  • If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.