Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Sometimes I rock it as a parent, other times I drop my phone on my sleeping child while taking a picture of it. It’s called balance.
  • I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?
  • You’d seriously think I was wanted for murder by the way I react when someone knocks on the door.
  • The only running I do is to chase the ice cream truck.
  • The sweater is an item of clothing that a child has to wear when parents are cold.
  • Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.