Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Praying none of y’all are unwrapping podcast equipment.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Age regressing by coughing like a toddler, with my tongue out.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

It’s called the Summer Olympics so one of the events should be running in flip flops to catch the ice cream man.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

If I buy the circus, the monkey will be the manager.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

I feel like people just come to the airport to cough.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

I want him in ways that are deeply deeply upsetting to modern feminism.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Damn girl, are you a plate of microwaved leftovers? Because you’re hot on the outside and cold on the inside.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

I’ve shouted so much sporting advice from my sofa already this summer. It’s very tiring but hopefully it’s helping.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

217 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,486

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,486

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,243

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Was that meant to be a joke or did you just accidentally spill a bunch of words you were carrying around?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I hope one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is single.

Spotted on Instagram:

“Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.

Going viral on Messenger:

I’m going to need to speak with the flowers about this.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

In the baking aisle, booing everyone buying imitation vanilla extract.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I don’t argue with idiots on the Internet, I just keep scrolling and mind my own business.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I received a bank alert text for suspicious activity. I was buying fruit.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

Going viral on YouTube:

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Going viral on Messenger:

Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or wont text me back.

One of the toughest jobs in parenting is serving the inevitable eviction notice on your kid’s pillow fort.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like the little architect is behind on their pillow rent! Time for a plush eviction! 🏰➡️📦🤭

activity, challenge, childhood, discipline, eviction, eviction notice, fort, humor, jobs, kids, kids activity, notice, parenting, parenting challenge, pillow, pillow fort, playful, playful discipline, serving

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Follow your dreams – ideally in a field that will still require humans when you graduate.

0

4 months ago

advice, career, dream, dreams, field, follow, future, graduate, human, humans, humor, job, still
The longer I work in corporate, the more I realize… Micromanaging is just insecurity dressed up as leadership.

0

2 months ago

corporate, dressed, humor, i, insecurity, just, leadership, longer, management, micromanaging, office, realize, work
Dua Lipa is a fantastic singer AND Mario’s advice to Luigi when he wants to get on a slightly higher platform.

0

2 months ago

advice, culture, dua, Dua Lipa, games, humor, lipa, Luigi, Mario, platform, pop, pop culture, singer, video, video games
Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

0

2 months ago

condom, even, humor, joke, ribs, taste
Boxes of pasta don’t need a plastic window. I believe pasta is in the box.

0

2 months ago

believe, box, food, grocery, humor, i, need, packaging, pasta, plastic, plastic window, sarcasm, window
I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

0

2 months ago

always, house, humor, i, introvert, leave, outside, reluctance, shouldn’t, social

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on Reddit this month:

Just let your girlfriend be crazy, like who cares, bro.

36 shares on Instagram this month:

Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

87 shares on Facebook this month:

Is my life this bad because I didn’t forward that email to 15 people back in 2007?

48 shares on Threads this month:

I’m sorry if I seem weird, it’s because I am.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

Lately I have the attention span of wait what?

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

When I don’t have money, I stop talking to women out of respect.

10 shares on Telegram this month:

I googled my symptoms, and I just need a day with you in the mountains.

76 shares on Twitch this month:

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

13 shares on Instagram this month:

Who you are before you have your coffee is the real you.

85 shares on Twitch this month:

The weather’s got more mood swings than a reality show reunion.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

An air mattress is the best way to tell your houseguests not to stay too long.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

When people say something is cray-cray it makes me wanna vom-vom.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

My swear jar is filing for an IPO soon.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

Capri Sun tastes as if scientists had bet that they could make fruit juice without fruit.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Some people are wise, some folks are otherwise.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Alexa, play everyone that played me.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Reading is a gateway drug to being less stupid.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Sorry for zoning out, bro. It’s just, I’ve been having a bad day for several years.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

The umbrella was going to be called brella, but the inventor hesitated.

Going bananas on Reddit:

“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

Just landed via Threads:

People will be like “there is no right or wrong way to do it” until you do it the wrong way.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Born to be a frolicker of the forest, forced to be a cog in the machine.

Spotted on Threads:

Just had a fight with every item in my closet. They started it.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Stephen King’s It is the bone chilling story about adults who are forced to spend time with their childhood friends.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I want to be a garbage man, so I only have to work one day a week.

Shared recently on Instagram:

As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.

Trending via Facebook:

She’s got style. She’s got grace. She dropped her cellphone on her face. She’s a lady.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

On Halloween, I’ll be handing out full size bars of really bad advice. Only while supplies last.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

One of the toughest jobs in parenting is serving the inevitable eviction notice on your kid’s pillow fort.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Follow your dreams – ideally in a field that will still require humans when you graduate.

The longer I work in corporate, the more I realize… Micromanaging is just insecurity dressed up as leadership.

Dua Lipa is a fantastic singer AND Mario’s advice to Luigi when he wants to get on a slightly higher platform.

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

Boxes of pasta don’t need a plastic window. I believe pasta is in the box.

I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨