Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Seems like being an asshole is a full-time job for some.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Calling me ugly isn’t even an insult, because I know already.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

Love how Batman: The Animated Series seems to take place in the 40s and the 50s and the 70s and the 90s all at once.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

If a girl sends you selfies and you don’t compliment her, she should be allowed to electrocute you.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I just be giggling, then start thinking about bills and remember ain’t nothing funny.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

I have a sundress and no man to bend me over in it, sad day.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Some people are so judgmental, I can tell by just looking at them.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Watched a movie on Netflix last night that was so bad, I walked out of my own house.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,594

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

I think I could actually generate electricity with how irritated I get sometimes.

Just shared via Telegram:

Oh great, you brought your ancient ancestors with you.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

“Why does my back always hurt?”, I say, while never sitting upright in a chair.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Be the reason someone spits out their drink today.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I’m going to a karaoke bar tomorrow, where I’ll sing every song in the style of Yoko Ono.

Spotted on X:

Whoever first said, “It gets to a point,” was definitely at that point, and I feel them deeply.

Live now on LinkedIn:

My most abusive relationship is with my own brain.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Set my sex robot to boyfriend mode and now it’s liking other girls’ pictures on Insta.

Just landed via Twitch:

Tweeting with no audience feels like screaming jokes into a cornfield.

Opened two gifts this morning, and they were my eyes.

4 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Surprise! My eyes are wide open and ready to roll… or maybe just roll back into bed 😂👀🎁

eyes, gift, gifts, humor, morning, surprise

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

41 shares on Twitch this month:

“Got milk?” Buddy, I don’t even have self-esteem.

95 shares on TikTok this month:

How do I get someone to unknow me? I no longer want to be known by these people.

43 shares on TikTok this month:

If one door opens when another door closes, your house is probably haunted.

83 shares on Slack this month:

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

12 shares on Slack this month:

The only difference between hungry and horny is where you insert the cucumber.

74 shares on Threads this month:

It’s comical when I lean back in my chair only to realize it’s a stool.

27 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m obsessed with adding a second completely unnecessary tweet to all my tweets, like, oh, you thought I was done.

85 shares on Messenger this month:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

75 shares on Reddit this month:

Sex is cool, but have you ever received reassurance without asking for it?

18 shares on Telegram this month:

Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Telling my coworkers I can’t talk in meetings today because I need to save my voice for concerts this weekend.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

“What’s love?” Grandma sliding money into my hand like a drug dealer. Yeah, man, that’s love.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

Study international relations and political science if you watch the news and think, I’d like this to make me even more depressed.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Turns out strange women lying in ponds distributing swords was a better basis for a system of government actually.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Adult friendships are difficult. The people I get on best with never want to leave the house either.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

The amount I’m sighing these days could fuel a small wind farm.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

I’ve never really had a beach body, but my snowman body is coming along quite nicely.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Sometimes I wish I was a millennial, so I could talk about sex with my friends.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

A mustache is just mouth bangs.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

I’m a private person except for when I’m publicly trauma dumping on social media.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

Wisdom of the day: Don’t do anything you don’t want to explain to the paramedic.

Live now on Facebook:

I hate it when I’m cleaning the house and suddenly find a bowl of ice cream in my lap and my soap opera on.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.

Seen just now on Instagram:

My diet plan is sometimes, when I’m eating chips, I drop some on the floor, and I don’t eat those ones.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Can’t wait for this AI bubble to pop so we can all go back to normal, just like how the internet completely disappeared after the dot-com bubble popped.

Shared recently on Discord:

Not to brag, but my wife just described the dinner I made as “interesting.”

Just landed via Facebook:

Can we change the phrase “Can I be frank with you” to “Can I be william with you”? I don’t want to be Frank.

Going viral on Pinterest:

The last time I said I wanted to try missionary, she sent me to a remote village in Africa.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I don’t even want to talk about the things I had to do to that elf to get back on the nice list.

Making waves on Messenger:

I don’t approve of political jokes. I’ve seen what happens when they get elected.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Opened two gifts this morning, and they were my eyes.

WhatsApp shouldn’t just display “seen”, but also “lies” and “also writes with other girls”!

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.

No one told me adulting would involve trying to avoid so many scams.

Going to McDonald’s to get the Grinch meal, then going to Burger King to get the Spongebob meal. Then disappearing into the forest for twenty years.

There’s nothing like the first two months with a man when he’s still pretending to be a good person.

The moon is literally dragging the oceans around, and you think your body shouldn’t feel it?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Opened two gifts this morning, and they were my eyes.

Keep the laugh going 😂

WhatsApp shouldn’t just display “seen”, but also “lies” and “also writes with other girls”!

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.

No one told me adulting would involve trying to avoid so many scams.

Going to McDonald’s to get the Grinch meal, then going to Burger King to get the Spongebob meal. Then disappearing into the forest for twenty years.

There’s nothing like the first two months with a man when he’s still pretending to be a good person.

The moon is literally dragging the oceans around, and you think your body shouldn’t feel it?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨