Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

“You look happy.” Thanks, I stopped dating.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Have you ever been so stressed that you’re calm?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

I’m so smart, I got rid of cable and now I only have $638 in monthly streaming services.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Women love it when you approach them on the street and say “whoa, is there a hot babe convention in town?”

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

If I ask “What’s your zodiac sign?” it’s either because we’re vibing or you’re getting on my nerves.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

The bad news is there was a lot of turbulence on my flight this morning. The good news is my phone counted it as steps.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

Growing up, I didn’t think the expensive addiction that would ruin me would be Heinz ketchup, but here we are.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Don’t blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Why is being alive so expensive? I’m not even having a good time.