Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

My favorite part about going camping is the part where I stay at home, and I don’t go camping.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

My mind is like someone dumped the entire junk drawer on a trampoline.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

My so-called “friends” have asked that I stop referring to them that way.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Parallel parking: where true relationships are tested!

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

The secret to work life balance is generational wealth.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

For my future, I wish for another planet and a ticket to get there.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

I might not be able to speak another language but I can speak English slower!

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Of course I stay hydrated. Carbohydrated.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,385

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

As a kid, I didn’t understand the subtext of ‘I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus’ at all. I thought Mommy was cheating.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

My bank account is also in retrograde.

Shared recently on Threads:

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

Seen just now on Threads:

People who work in retail should be allowed to slap a customer or two each Christmas, as a little treat.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to flirt today.

Making waves on Reddit:

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the best thirst trap poster of them all?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.

Trending via Reddit:

“This was on sale!” is why I’m always broke.

Trending via Snapchat:

The older I get, the more I walk like Charlie Chaplin.

Seen just now on Instagram:

What was the main bloke called in Harry Potter?

Seeing my kids getting along, laughing, and peacefully playing together is the best minute of my day.

0
Seeing my kids getting along, laughing, and peacefully playing together is the best minute of my day.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Watching my little angels master the delicate dance between sibling love and chaos is like witnessing a live sitcom – with a sprinkle of chaos, a dash of giggles, and a whole lot of heartwarming moments! 🎭💕 #SiblingsDaycareAndLaughs"

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m not into casual sex. Send me a résumé.

100 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Cleaned the bathroom window. Wasn’t frosted glass at all.

64 shares on X this month:

The only thing smart about you is your wisdom tooth.

63 shares on Threads this month:

I have no beef with vegetarians.

75 shares on Facebook this month:

Imagine having someone to come home to who doesn’t have fur.

12 shares on WeChat this month:

Not to brag but there are so many movies out there that have watched me sleep.

82 shares on WeChat this month:

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

I wish my midlife crisis made me want to get a gym membership and a revenge body, but instead I’m eating Snickers for breakfast in bed.

20 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You only live once and thank God for that.

66 shares on Facebook this month:

Nobody is busier than a woman who isn’t into you.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Be useless, so nobody can use you.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I would do absolutely anything for my friends, except answer their text messages.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Drugs don’t ruin lives. Drug tests do.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Does my special place in hell have wi-fi?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

After you’ve been married a long time, you become able to communicate nonverbally. At least, I’m pretty sure that’s why we never speak.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I wasn’t really listening but that’s awesome, unless it isn’t of course.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Be the one that gets asked to remove the hockey mask, during a conference call, on Friday the 13th.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If three ghosts visited me on Christmas, I’d make them play Mario Party with me.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

So many people these days are too judgmental. I can tell just by looking at them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,724

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

My cats won’t talk to me because I came home late from work.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

(lost in the labyrinth and I’m wearing a Fitbit) Nice, got my 10,000 steps.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Calling a lobotomy a “lobobo” to fit in with Gen Z.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

I’ve never had a beer in the shower; I’m saving it for a very low moment in my life.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

I was dismayed to hear the story of Rumpelstiltskin. I had no idea he was like that outside of work.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Babies sighing is so funny to me. My dear, the time to sigh has not come.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Yeah, the planet is dying. The government hates us. The animals are leaving. The aliens aren’t contacting us. We might be alone. It just might be you and me.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

I am not old. I am in the prime of my decay.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

(Seeing the guy next to me reading a novel) You know, none of that happened, right?

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

I ordered one of those Tempura mattresses. Way too crunchy.

Making waves on WeChat:

This post is invisible, and only those going to Hell can see it.

Trending via Twitch:

Being in college when The Chainsmokers dropped Closer was an experience to say the least.

Going viral on Telegram:

I did nothing wrong. I tried to do nothing and did it wrong.

Making waves on Telegram:

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Why are “hemorrhoids” not called “assteroids”?

Making waves on Reddit:

Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

Just landed via YouTube:

Not only is it not Friday, but it’s not even Thursday.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Can you lose weight by running away from your feelings?

Making waves on WeChat:

You can tell a group isn’t gonna make it big just by their name.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴