Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

It’s a beautiful morning. Lots of people out walking their phones.

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HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

I don’t trust anyone who gets enraged over messed-up fast food orders.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Calling the police when someone unfollows.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Apartments show you 44 pics of the lobby. Man, I ain’t living in there.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

At my next therapy session, I will be discussing the trauma I’ve been dealing with ever since the grocery store layout was altered.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

“You’re not allowed to be grumpy on a Friday, it’s in the fine print somewhere.”