Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

The me who snips coupons needs to communicate better with the me who walks into the stores.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

“Have you asked Chat GPT?” Have you lost your mind?

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

I will marry a tall, masculine, lovey-dovey man who can’t breathe when I ignore his existence.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

I get it cicadas, I’m ready to scream for six weeks too.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

One of the most embarrassing things in the world: walking downhill.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

I love how one day my body just decided “You know what you really need is some ear hair.”

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Should I be worried that buzzards circle me when I go for a run?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,616

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

I don’t understand why my husband has to pay for a UFC fight when he could just throw one piece of candy on the floor in front of our kids.

Going viral on Instagram:

You don’t have to remember details when you don’t lie.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Normalize having a threatening aura, but really just being a sweetheart.

Shared recently on Telegram:

If anyone is still on Facebook, please check on my parents.

Just landed via X:

Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

Going viral on X:

Mister Sandman, bring me a meme. Make it the dumbest shit that I’ve ever seen.

Just landed via Discord:

Sometimes you send an email that requires a response, and the other person writes back right away, and it’s like NO NOT YET.

Going viral on Discord:

USPS tracking: Step 1: We don’t think it exists. Step 2: Delivered.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Rather than touching grass, I recommend going to a concert and experiencing the live performance of that one song you hold religiously close to your heart.

Spider-Man, but set in rural England so he just has to walk everywhere.

3 weeks ago

Playful quote imagining Spider-Man walking through rural England instead of swinging.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Introducing… 'Peter Pedestrian'! 🚶‍♂️🇬🇧 Watch as our hero tackles the daily challenge of walking through picturesque cobblestone streets and dodging mischievous sheep instead of swinging through skyscrapers. Villains, beware – this friendly neighborhood walker is always one step ahead… quite literally!"

countryside, england, everywhere, humor, just, rural, rural England, setting, Spider-Man, superhero, transportation, walk

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on YouTube this month:

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

45 shares on Slack this month:

Cool things happen when you start hanging out outside a lot. Animals just appear and stuff.

51 shares on Messenger this month:

We seriously need to bring back courting. What the hell is ‘wyd tonight?’ Arrive on a horse and bring flowers like a man.

23 shares on Threads this month:

Normalize having a threatening aura, but really just being a sweetheart.

30 shares on Threads this month:

I will selflessly protect my family from a life of diabetes by eating all the sweets myself.

66 shares on Slack this month:

I feel like the person who named pink eye also named orange juice.

51 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t always carry all the groceries on one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

42 shares on Facebook this month:

The sandwich I made for lunch didn’t even make it until 10am.

35 shares on Telegram this month:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean that it ain’t gonna be a hell of a lot of fun.

42 shares on WeChat this month:

Microsoft Teams needs to add a “spank” reaction for when I want to reprimand my employees during a video call.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Wearing shorts and my pale legs screamed at the sensation of sunlight like vampires.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Back to work after the long holiday weekend, so you’re finally away from the relatives you don’t like, and back with the co-workers you don’t like.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Downloading the Titanic soundtrack. It’s syncing right now.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Wine shopping is 10% grape variety and 90% “ooohh, this one has a pretty label.”

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I wish I had a speed bump between my brain and my mouth.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not sure my body can handle much more of this “getting out of bed” nonsense.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s so unrealistic for me to delete WhatsApp, but man, I’d love to do it.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,344

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Super excited to not contribute anything worthwhile today.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

My wife just admitted a mistake. What do I have to do now? What does this mean for my future? Help me!

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Babies invented being in a bad mood for no reason, and they continue to innovate in the field.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

SHEIN does entirely too much on their app. Feels like a freaking casino every time you open it.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

I want a restraining order on everyone who doesn’t wear deodorant.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Don’t let me drive if you’re gonna scream every time we almost die.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

I’m at the age where a house arrest no longer sounds like the worst thing.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Wonder what I should wear to World War III.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I’ve skipped midlife crisis and gone straight to birdwatching.

Just shared via Messenger:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Shared recently on TikTok:

You know you’re the father of teen boys when a shoe print on the ceiling no longer fazes you.

Going viral on Telegram:

I remember when I was broke… I’m still broke, that’s why I remember so well.

Spotted on TikTok:

Manipulative people really be like “oh, so now I’m the bad guy for being the bad guy?”

Making waves on Discord:

Call me constipated the way I don’t give a shit.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

Just landed via Discord:

When you get angry, take a breath and count to ten. Throw a punch at eight. Nobody expects that.

Just shared via TikTok:

I have this rare skin disease called perfect.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴