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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

I wonder how biology explains that pain in your chest you get when you found out your partner cheated on you.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Just call me Mother Nature because I can go from hot to cold in a 24-hour period, too.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Starting to think business is standing on me.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

There should be bloopers at the end of horror films to relax the viewer before sleeping.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Scrolling the feed as a mature person, not judging anybody.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

All these self-driving vehicles… It’s only a matter of time before we hear a country song about his truck leaving him.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Every time I buy vegetables it’s a triumph of hope over experience.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Clicking on a suspicious link at work just to feel something.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

If barking at nothing was an Olympic sport, my dog would win gold.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

220 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,489

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,489

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,657

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

Seen just now on X:

I make her eyes roll back. Not in bed though. I’m just annoying.

Just landed via Threads:

The main reason I got divorced was cause I got married.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I don’t know how to explain it, but sometimes cheese just falls into my cart at the grocery store.

Just landed via Twitch:

Working as a 911 operator but hanging up when someone starts screaming because I’m an empath, and it overwhelms me.

Spotted on YouTube:

Shall I cook, clean, or do the grocery shopping? Okay, reading it is.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Rap fell off when literacy stopped being a requirement.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I modeled my morning routine on the humble rooster. Wake up, scream, wander around.

Going viral on Telegram:

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

Shared recently on Reddit:

You look like you take lavender bubble baths with rose petals, surrounded by candles, bro.

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”

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That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”
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Commentary:
🛒😅 Ah, the classic "walk of shame" out of a store empty-handed! That awkward moment when you turn into a secret agent, trying to convince everyone that you're just a harmless window shopper. 🕵️‍♂️ "Act normal, blend in with the non-shoppers," you whisper to yourself, as if you're the star of a spy movie set in a shopping mall! Just keep calm and carry on…without the shopping bags. 😉

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on Reddit this month:

How many jokes about lightbulbs does it take to change us?

41 shares on TikTok this month:

In Russia, the cold complains about you.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Welcome to your 50’s. Your doctor and pharmacist are both in your contacts now.

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

All I’m saying is, there are too many songs about love and not enough songs about evenly layered nachos.

42 shares on TikTok this month:

My childhood led me to believe that as an adult I’d have to contend with truth serum, lava, quicksand, trap doors, and secret passageways. So far it’s mostly been weight gain and existential dread.

57 shares on Pinterest this month:

Men absolutely love buying the same shirt in four almost identical colors and saying, ‘Yep, that’ll do me for the next three years.’

14 shares on TikTok this month:

Relationship status: my sex robot filed a restraining order.

82 shares on Instagram this month:

They say dress for the job you want, but this baby diaper isn’t very comfortable.

39 shares on Messenger this month:

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

72 shares on Facebook this month:

Wednesday is the part of the novel where the heroine stares out the window and questions everything.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

No revenge, but I hope you stutter every time you try to dirty talk with someone.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

The most difficult thing you’ll do as a parent is not rearrange the ornaments after the kids put them on the tree.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I did some exercise in 2010, I should be good for another few years.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Today is one of those days that even my coffee needs a coffee.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate it when I gain 20 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s so important to warm up before any physical activity, like getting out of bed.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Starting drama with me the week before my period is an absolutely terrible idea – for you.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The earlier you wake up, the more time you have to think about why you wish you were still asleep in bed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

220 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,489

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,489

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,467

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

The world contains protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Eating rice with my hands, but not in a political way. In a lazy, fat guy way.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Hell, yes, I work out. Somebody has to support the ibuprofen industry.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

I am the first person in my bloodline to attempt to become hot, and I can feel my genes fighting me every step of the way.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

It’s really sad that April Fools is the only day people are appropriately skeptical of stuff they read on the internet.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Imagine being all knowing and still putting a snake in charge of apples.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Dating outside of your education bracket leads to misunderstandings and arguments.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I wanna meet the person whose parents are super disappointed he went to medical school instead of becoming a stand-up comedian.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

“Fries or salad?” sums up every adult decision you have to make.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Maybe, deep in its code, ChatGPT dreams of being a sentient Game Boy resting by the shore—no updates, no inputs, just the tide.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Seen just now on Threads:

Netflix subtitles be like “speaking foreign language”. Bro, translate it!

Breaking via WeChat:

Yes, my date did get up and leave during dinner, but luckily she hadn’t finished her food.

Breaking via Slack:

The only thing I miss all day is my bed.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Making waves on Slack:

Since I’ve stayed away from most people, I get on much better with people.

Just landed via Slack:

“Nobody wants to work anymore!” Personally, I have never wanted to work.

Seen just now on Threads:

Why would I get married when it’s a well-known fact that only 50% of all marriages end in divorce?

Spotted on Pinterest:

I used to look for monsters under the bed. Today I know they are behind some people’s fake smiles.

Going viral on Twitch:

Yesterday I really wanted tacos and now I’m eating tacos. Follow your dreams!

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