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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

A dating app for people who self sabotage called Hinder.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

My card declined at Subway and they started eating the sandwich in front of me.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Patience: something you have when there are too many witnesses around.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

My cats won’t talk to me because I came home late from work.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

I wish companies would use pictures of models looking frazzled and exhausted on their websites, so I can get a real idea of what their clothes will look like on me.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Zen and the Art of Empty Pockets.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Everytime I spend $20 I think this is fine because I won’t do it again. And then would you believe.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Okay, new plan, I’m going to marry a Kardashian.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

828 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,990

Funny Quotes Topics

13,934

Funny Quotes Images

10,990

18 minutes ago

3,433

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I love when someone is telling a story and you can tell even from their version that they’re the villain.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If you are hotter than me, it means I’m cooler than you.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Netflix and chi…cken nuggets.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

You know when you have so much to do that you just sit down and do nothing?

Going viral on Twitch:

If I say, “First of all,” run away, because I have prepared peer-reviewed research, data, and charts, and I will destroy you.

Going viral on X:

I like people who make me forget that I’m shy.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.

Spotted on X:

It takes only one person in this world to make you smile. It’s called a plastic surgeon.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I would be more patient if it didn’t take so long.

Just landed via TikTok:

I don’t care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive.

The Playstation is broken and the child has noticed that I live here too.

6 months ago

The Playstation is broken and the child has noticed that I live here too.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🎮 Oh no, the Playstation is broken! 🙈 Looks like it's time for the parent to step up and remind the child that there's more to life than just gaming – like spending quality time with family! 🏠💕 After all, it's not just about high scores, but also about making memories together. Let's turn this tech mishap into a fun bonding experience! 💪😄

broken, child, family, gaming, here, humor, i, live, noticed, observation, parenting, Playstation, too

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

828 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,990

Funny Quotes Topics

13,934

Funny Quotes Images

10,990

18 minutes ago

3,436

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

I’m now at the age where happy hour is a nap.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Maybe, deep in its code, ChatGPT dreams of being a sentient Game Boy resting by the shore—no updates, no inputs, just the tide.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

I haven’t cleaned my shower in so long, it’s becoming a terrarium. Absolutely gorgeous.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

I used to be cool and now I say things like “It’s so loud in here, I can’t hear myself think”.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

I’m opening a secret ice cream club called The Inside Scoop.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren’t happy.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

Today, I’m wearing pink to raise awareness for people like me who forget to separate their red laundry from their whites.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Every night, millions of teeth go unbrushed.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

That fight could’ve been an email.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

I wish I had the confidence of someone who would let themselves be tattooed in a place they can’t see.

Reported on X:

Me, watching porn: they’re just going to let that pizza get cold?

Shared recently on YouTube:

Double chins are better than double faces.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

If I ever experience an earthquake, my first thought will probably be it’s Godzilla.

Trending via Threads:

Filling my PEZ dispenser with Ibuprofen for whimsical pain relief.

Going viral on Instagram:

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

Making waves on Discord:

Bought a house plant so I wouldn’t be the only one dying of dehydration around here.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Don’t let anyone ruin your day. Be a man. Ruin it yourself.

Just shared via Instagram:

I thrive in a waiting room. You need me to sit in a chair and look at my phone? No worries, love, I do this at home.

Seen just now on Instagram:

One day you’re young and carefree and the next, you’re preheating the bathroom before you go in for a shower.

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