The worst is when it’s too late to take a nap but too early to go to bed.

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Why did they call it K-pop and not Seoul music?

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Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

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Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

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Mocktails are awesome because they ask the question ‘how much could juice cost?’

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Went to an antique show and people started bidding on me.

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At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children.

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I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

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A wise man once said, “Bees don’t waste their time explaining to flies that honey is better than shit.”

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Chocolate doesn’t ask silly questions, chocolate understands.

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Men look so amazing for people who use the same product for their teeth, hair, floor and car washing.