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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

People pass a joint around like it’s no big deal, but the minute I ask someone to do that with their Subway sandwich, I’m a weirdo.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

I always thought orthopaedic shoes were overrated, but I stand corrected.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

If you buy something with a lifetime warranty and it breaks, the manufacturer will send a hitman to your house.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

One of my greatest strengths is appearing busy so people don’t try to speak to me.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

You can reach me by butterfly.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

They should make the last foot of dental floss red so you know when you’re about to run out.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Whatever you ask the Universe for under this post, you will get next week.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

The feminine urge to start a coven.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

There are people who know when to reply all and when not to reply all, and none of them work at your company.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Is ice cream for dinner a thing, because ice cream for dinner should be be a thing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Jan 31, 2026

3,606

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

She is both the storm and the shelter.

Making waves on YouTube:

People who shower at night are bold enough to assume tomorrow’s even happening.

Going viral on YouTube:

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

Shared recently on X:

Do you use AI, or is the AI using you?

Freshly posted on Slack:

My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

Going viral on TikTok:

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

The feminine urge to start a coven.

Trending via Snapchat:

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If I ever have a daughter, I’m going to call her Erica, but spell it Airwrecka.

Making waves on TikTok:

“You smell so good!” Okay, so kiss me.

TV lead me to believe grave digging would be a lot easier.

1 day ago

Humorous text about how TV made grave digging seem surprisingly simple.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, it seems like whoever said that quote must have been sorely disappointed when they realized that grave digging doesn't come with commercial breaks or a laugh track! TV really does have a way of making everything look so effortless, doesn't it? Remember, always take TV portrayals with a grain of salt – especially when it comes to unconventional career choices!

belief, digging, expectation, grave, grave digging, humor, irony, misperception, TV

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on X this month:

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

27 shares on Pinterest this month:

Dear everyone. Upset, bored, angry or hungry. I’m here for you. Sincerely, fridge.

24 shares on X this month:

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

13 shares on Discord this month:

I always need to pee, but it’s just because my heart is so big it pushes on my bladder.

51 shares on Twitch this month:

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

92 shares on Messenger this month:

The audacity of my parents’ oldies station now playing 80s music.

62 shares on Messenger this month:

I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise, and then I assume that they are lying to make fun of me.

45 shares on Messenger this month:

That very depressing moment when you find out the fire alarm that went off at work was just a test.

83 shares on Slack this month:

It’s difficult to play hard to get when I’m already hard to want.

61 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Laziness is the mother of all bad habits, but ultimately she is a mother, and we should respect her.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Living with a dog is 90% following each other around, watching each other go potty, and wondering what the other has in their mouth.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I think it’s very sexy of me to still move with love in a world like this.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I just want everyone to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

My back and I are definitely not the same age.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Got a scam email full of mistakes like they’re not even trying. It won’t be long before AI takes their jobs.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I have this rare skin disease called perfect.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I always carry a knife with me in case I run into someone with 10,000 spoons.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Wednesday is the part of the novel where the heroine stares out the window and questions everything.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing brings neighbors together like a few cops cars in front of another neighbor’s house that no one likes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,360

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

The worst person you know is in therapy right now, being told they need to put themselves first.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Blowing kisses to my coworkers so that nobody talks to me today.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

The feminine urge to say “ouch” when I bump into things that doesn’t even hurt.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

A good hack to make my house look clean and tidy in the evening is to turn all the lights off.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Peer pressure has nothing on me; all my bad decisions are made single-handedly.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

This flight is so long, I don’t know where I’m going anymore. I just live here now. Even the crying baby gave up.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

I’m tired of things costing money.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

I’m getting close to that age where people applaud the things I’m “still able to do”.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

I like running because it’s cheaper than paying for a gym membership. If the gym wants the money I owe them, they’ll have to catch me.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

I miss the days when you could simply end a phone call by slamming the receiver down angrily.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Straighten your back and drink some water, you dehydrated banana.

Making waves on Threads:

God, I’m not trying to rush you for my soulmate; but could I get the tracking number?

Shared recently on Telegram:

I’m so cold, I wish I could get in the dryer.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Accepting you’re about to throw up, gotta be the worst feeling on God’s green earth.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I don’t know when people started calling hot dogs ‘glizzys,’ but I hate it, and you all need to stop immediately.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

No kids at my wedding. Gonna Uber the flower girl home when she’s done.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

It’s funny how drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 7 beers and 5 shots in two hours go down like a fat kid on a seesaw.

Just landed via Messenger:

Yeah, sex is cool and all, but have you ever crawled out of the worst depression of your life and got your spark back?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look.

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