Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Imagine getting a surprise 'lick alert' from your AirPods! 🤪👅 Just when you thought they couldn't get any more personalized… Battery low or just feeling extra affectionate? 😂 #AirPodsGoneWild"

absurdity, AirPods, battery, ear, ears, humor, inside, licking, low, technology, tongue

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

90% of the things I worry about never happen. Worrying seems to be working.

2 months ago

90, anxiety, happen, humor, i, irony, life, never, seems, things, working, worry, worrying
It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

2 months ago

balance, health, healthy, humor, insane, little, mental, mental health, positivity, self-care, sometimes
The easiest way to shop with kids is not to.

3 months ago

advice, challenge, experience, family, fun, humor, kids, parenting, shop, shopping
Nobody rots in bed like I do.

2 months ago

bed, humor, i, lazy, nobody, procrastination, rot, sleep
Yesterday, my boss asked me what I did for a living.

1 week ago

asked, boss, conversation, humor, i, job, living, me, question, work, yesterday
I look stable, but I talk to animals, and wait for them to reply.

2 months ago

animal, animals, conversation, humor, i, imagination, personality, quirky, reply, stable, talk, wait

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

53 shares on X this month:

My brain says “Let’s do something exciting today” but my body says “Don’t listen to that fool.”

15 shares on TikTok this month:

The sweet potato is the kindest vegetable.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

60 shares on WeChat this month:

Looking to sell my DeLorean. Great shape, low mileage. Only driven from time to time.

61 shares on Discord this month:

“You let your cat on the bed?” I would put her on my life insurance.

42 shares on Snapchat this month:

Just saw two identical twins out in public together. No disrespect to that lifestyle but please keep it private.

93 shares on Messenger this month:

I have more photos of food on my phone than I do of my children.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Getting an extra 20 minutes in the day when someone cancels a meeting is like finding a penny on the ground. Not gonna use it for anything, but wow, am I excited.

88 shares on Slack this month:

Workplace Wrapped: you had 60k minutes of meetings this year that could’ve been an email.

22 shares on Pinterest this month:

Of course there’s birth control for men. It’s called the way they act.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

I’m not saying I’m old. I’m just saying that my dinner time and bedtime are getting dangerously close to each other.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

At the end of the day, it’s just me and me.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Too many types of pasta. I can say my fav is Fliccaroni and not one of you can be sure if it’s real. Look at you googling it.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

I didn’t lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

You are depressed because your ancestors fought, danced, and ate meals together, and you eat alone in the dark while staring at a glowing rectangle.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

If you’re tired of “food” and want to try something a bit more sophisticated, may I recommend “cuisine”?

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

It’s a shame that you can’t hold people up to the light like banknotes to see whether they are fake or real.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Cool times create cool guys.

Just landed via Instagram:

Sometimes, before bedtime, I fall asleep on the couch. It’s my little sleep appetizer… my nappetizer.

Just shared via Discord:

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Going bananas on Reddit:

What do you mean I never reach out? I literally thought about you.

Going viral on Instagram:

A dating app for people who suck at flirting called Fumble.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

At the grocery store, progressively booing louder as the clerk scans each item.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

On the upside, my kids are helping with the dishes. On the downside, my kids are helping with the dishes.

Just landed via X:

Having a crush is so fun, it’s literally just butterflies and delusion.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

Trending via Threads:

Hear me out. What if we don’t elect another president, and we all just promise to be really good?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

What if AirPods had tongues and they started licking the inside of your ears to indicate they’re low on battery?

Keep the laugh going 😂

90% of the things I worry about never happen. Worrying seems to be working.

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

The easiest way to shop with kids is not to.

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

Yesterday, my boss asked me what I did for a living.

I look stable, but I talk to animals, and wait for them to reply.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨